Chapter 15

𝙻𝚘𝚗𝚍𝚢𝚗

Aries and I ain’t really spoke since that night. And it’s not even like we argued or nothin’ after. It’s just… every time I look at her, my brain wanna replay the whole damn thing like it’s my favorite scene or some shit.

The way we was holdin’ onto each other like rent was due, how my fingers got lost in her curls, how her grip around my waist tightened like she wasn’t planning on letting go no time soon.

And the worst part? 

We stayed like that the entire night. Like two dumbasses glued together. So yeah, by the time morning hit, I was ready to evaporate into thin air. It was awkward as hell for me. But her? she acted like everything was normal, Like we ain’t just turned into a whole couple in the middle of the night for no damn reason.

Meanwhile I was strugglin’ knowin’ that I woke up still in her arms, face half buried in her chest, hand clutchin’ her bicep like it was the only thing keepin’ me from slidin’ off the face of the earth.

And she just…got up like it was a regular Tuesday. Didn’t say shit. Didn’t even LOOK weird about it. And if I’m being honest? That pissed me off more than anything. Like oh, so you just be cuddlin’ bitches on a random Tuesday?? That’s regular to you??

So now? Now I’m actin’ like she don’t exist. And what’s really blowin’ me? She’s just lettin’ me. It’s like she really don’t give a flying fuck. 

No “what’s wrong,” no “you good?” none of that. Just… going about her day like I’m not over here spiraling in 4K. 

 She really out here accepting this shit like she at peace. 

Why the hell is she calm??!

“Is it just me or Aries been acting a lil’—”

“Busy?”

I shook my head quick. “No, not busy. I can’t find the word.” I let out a huff, my eyes narrowing on her.

She was behind a booth. Laughing. Smiling. Existing like life was sweet. Supposedly she was helping Khalil with some game booth for the campus event today. and lately, that’s all she been talking ’bout. like it’s her full time job or sumn.

“Oh, you mean brand new?” Imani hummed real casual.

I pointed at her immediately. “Exactly that.”

“It’s prolly ’cause Khalil’s cousin’s friend and her been hanging out for the past couple days,” she added like it was nothing.

My brows furrowed so tight I felt that shit in my soul. “Who??”

Imani tilted her head forward, and I followed her line of sight. And there she go. Short. Thick in all the right places. Walking up like she belonged. She side hugged Aries and I swear my chest tightened so fast it felt like my lungs said, “yeah, we not doin’ this with you.”

And Aries smiled.

Like really smiled.

“Aries never said anything ’bout her?” I cleared my throat, tryna sound normal and not like I just got emotionally jumped in broad daylight.

“Essence been ’round. Hangin’ with Khalil, Chelsea and Aries for a couple days now,” Imani said.

Essence.

Even her name irritatin’ the hell outta me.

“She even go here??” I muttered, taking a sip of my iced coffee like it wasn’t fightin’ for its life in my shaky ass hand.

“Nope.” Imani shook her head just as Britney popped up outta nowhere. “Hey bitches!”

Of course she don’t.

I hummed, barely liftin’ my hand. “Hey.”

“What’s up with her? Why she look like that?” Britney pointed at me like I was on display.

“She mad her crush is into Essence,” Imani said calmly.

My head snapped toward Imani so fast I almost got whiplash as I smacked her arm. “She into her??”

Britney glanced over and I immediately grabbed her wrist. “Bitch don’t look?? They gon see you.”

Both of them started snickering like they wasn’t about to get cussed out and slapped.

“I don’t know if she into her into her but…” Imani trailed off.

“But what??” I cut my eyes at her. “Finish the sentence?”

She hesitated but Britney didn’t. Britney leaned in like she couldn’t hold it. “Girl, just say it.” she rolled her eyes. “They been eye fucking one another.”

…Oh.

My heart dropped so fast it damn near hit the pavement, all the strength leaving my hands like somebody unplugged me.

I hummed softly, forcing a smile like that ain’t just hit me dead in my chest. I glanced over again and there she was, standing next to Aries like she found her favorite spot in the world. Her head leaning against Aries’ arm.

I looked down at my iced coffee, my grip weak as hell. This was sick. I wasn’t sure what the fuck was wrong with me. My body wasn’t listening to me at all. My legs felt weird. My hands wouldn’t stop shaking and my chest felt tight like somebody tied it in a knot and said good luck bitch.

“Well…she mad pretty…” I muttered, Imani and Britney both humming like they agreed.

I hated myself a little for saying it. Because it was true.

She was pretty as hell. Bad, even. Which made this even more annoying.

“So Whitney ain’t her bae after all,” Britney teased.

I rolled my eyes, bringing the cup to my lips again even though I knew damn well this coffee wasn’t helping me at all. My heart was beating like I just ran a mile but I’m standing still, looking dumb as hell.

“Where’s Whitney at anyway? She been real quiet,” Imani added and I hummed, barely hearing her. 

My eyes stayed locked on Aries as she was by the booth helping move boxes, her sleeves riding up, and her muscles flexing like she ain’t even trying.

And Essence? She just stood there staring at her too. Not even hiding it. At one point she squeezed Aries’ bicep like she was checking the quality.

I let out a harsh huff, yankin’ my phone out and scrollin’ like I suddenly had something important to do as if I wasn’t watching every single thing out the corner of my eye. 

But I wasn’t even talkin’ to Aries right now, so that shit ain’t even matter.

“Wait—”I snapped my head back up. “Why everybody know her but me?”

Imani didn’t even hesitate. “Because every time we ask you to hang, you vanish like a ghost and hop on the bus.”

“Yeah…” Britney trailed, then let out a laugh. “Which is crazy, ’cause you hate takin’ the bus unless it’s life or death.”

I sucked my teeth, looking off. “Okay and? That’s… besides the point.”

But it wasn’t.

These past couple days, soon as class ended, I was gone. No lingering, no talking, no letting Aries walk me out like she usually did. I ain’t even give her the chance to offer me a ride. Just straight to the bus like my life depended on it.

Anything to not be around her.

Because being around her? Yeah… no. That shit been messing with me.

Knowing I let myself get that close, that comfortable? Like my body remembered shit my pride was trying to delete. I couldn’t do it. I just couldn’t stand how she was acting like nothing happened. Like we ain’t spent a whole night tangled up like we was a thing.

And sleep? Don’t even get me started on that shit. I ain’t slept right since. 

That night? That was the best sleep I’ve had in years. And I was sick, throwing up, half dead… and still knocked out like a baby just ’cause she was holding me.

That don’t even make sense. Do you know how insane that sounds??? ‘Cause I do.

And I hate it.

I hate that every night since then, I been laying in my bed staring at the ceiling like a damn loser, lowkey hoping she’d just walk in like she got sense and lay down next to me again. Not say nothing and just get in the bed and hold me again like it wasn’t a big deal. Like it was normal.

I grimaced, shaking my head at myself.

Yeah, I needa get a grip.

I let out a low grumble. “I been avoiding her ass…” I muttered.

They both hummed at the same time. Loud. Nosy. Irritating.

I pinched the bridge of my nose. “We slept together a couple nights ago…” I said, quieter this time.

“You two had sex!?” Imani damn near yelled.

I whipped my head up so fast I saw stars and slapped her arm. “Lower your FUCKING voice?? The hell you say it like that for??”

“Who had sex?” Khalil’s voice popped up like a damn music ad you can’t skip.

I groaned immediately, waving him off like he was a fly. “Go AWAY! I’m talking to the girls.”

But of course, he ain’t move. And of course, behind him? Aries. Chelsea. And Miss “lemme lean on your arm like I pay rent there.”

I rolled my eyes so hard I’m surprised they ain’t detach. “Great,” I muttered.

I tried to look away from Aries but she walked up anyway, placing my favorite drink in front of me like we wasn’t beefin’ in my head. I glanced up. and—Yeah. There it go. Her eyes? Soft as hell like she ain’t been pissing me off for four straight days.

My heart skipped like it missed a flight of stairs. I clenched my iced coffee. “Thank you…” I mumbled.

She just hummed. Like she knew I was gon’ take it regardless.

“So…who had sex?” Khalil said again, like he was being paid to instigate.

“Khalil—go away?!” I snapped, pinching the bridge of my nose.

He smirked like I just told him a joke.

“What happened?” Aries asked. And I— God. I was already irritated, and now her voice all calm like she ain’t the reason pissed me off further.

“Nothing!?” I shot back, a little too sharp.

The whole group went quiet. Khalil raised his hands like, ‘I ain’t do nothing’, and backed off, dragging Aries, And of course. Essence followed too. Like a little…accessory.

Chelsea stayed though, looking between us like she was watching a live episode of drama.

“I mean… I kinda wanna know too.” she said carefully.

I let out a dry chuckle, shaking my head. “I didn’t have sex. Y’all know this.”

They leaned in like I just said the opposite.

“So what did you and Aries do?” Britney asked, smiling as if she already knew the answer.

Chelsea damn near jumped. “Aries?? As in you messing with the Aries that just left?” she pointed like she just spotted a celebrity. I grabbed her hand and gently pushed it down.

“No. We just slept together.”

Silence. 

Thick. Loud. Judgy silence. 

“Oh my God—” I threw my hands up. “Slept. As in bed. As in unconscious. Not fucking??”

They all exhaled like that clarified everything.

“Wait…” Britney leaned in, eyes wide. “Like cuddled and shit?”

I looked away. “Yes.”

“Like…all night?” Imani added.

“…Yes.”

They gasped like I just announced I’m pregnant.

I held my hand up quick. “Don’t start—”

“So you do have a crush,” Imani said, turning to face me fully.

“I sure as hell don’t!?” I snapped, jumping up from the bench. And immediately—I walked straight into somebody.

My cup slipped, cold liquid splashing across my white tee, the girls gasping behind me.

I just stood there for a second, staring down at the stain spreading across my shirt like my life wasn’t already in shambles.

“Shit—!” I hissed, looking up fast—

“Nigga, are you fuckin’ serious?” I snapped, glaring at Tyriq like I was two seconds from committing a felony. He glanced down at his shirt, then mine like we both ain’t see what just happened.

“Shit, I was just tryna holla at you…” He tugged at his shirt like that was supposed to fix anything.

I sucked my teeth so hard my ancestors probably heard it, shoving the empty coffee cup against his chest. “Holla at a washing machine, nigga.”

“Now move.” I grumbled as I brushed right past him and sped into the school halls, making a beeline for the bathroom.

If I had to stand out there one more second watching Aries play friendly with that girl, I was gonna lose what little sanity I had left.

“I swear if this nigga don’t leave me the fuck alone…” I muttered, pushing the door open and heading straight to the mirror.

My shirt? Completly ruined. My mood? Already in hell.

The bathroom door creaked open again and I looked up, fully ready to cuss somebody out—

“You okay?”

Of course it was Aries.

I dropped my gaze immediately, grabbing paper towels and dabbing at my shirt like that was gon magically undo the damage. “Mhm.”

“I saw him bump into you.” She stepped closer.

“Mhm.”

Real descriptive today. Love that for me.

“He wouldn’t have if you weren’t busy eye-fucking a certain someone,” I muttered under my breath. “But I digress.”

She paused. Then suddenly I felt her hands on me, gently turning me around.

“Let me help, Lo.”

I huffed immediately. “Quit callin’ me that.”

Not because I hated it. But because I liked it a lil’ too much.

And I was NOT about to unpack that right now.

She paused, just for a second, then tilted her head. “Youn mean that.”

I glared at her, folding my arms. “I don’t… but shut up..”

She huffed a quiet laugh, lowering my arms when I tried to fold them like I was about to stand on business.

Her eyes dropped to my shirt. “World’s best ex-girlfriend?” she read.

I nodded. “It’s ironic.”

“Mm. You living up to it?” she teased.

I sucked my teeth. “You pushing it.”

She chuckled under her breath, then without warning—She pulled her shirt off.

I blinked. 

Then blinked again.

Her walking around campus like that? 

Her tattoos were on display, her chain glinting, muscles showing, and her boxers peeking over her jeans like they had something to prove. Yeah, she lost her damn mind.

“Absolutely not.” I grabbed the shirt and tried to throw it back at her chest. “Put that back on.”

“You not about to be walking around campus like that,” I said, quick and firm.

She caught my wrist mid-motion. “You need it more than me??”

“Aries, you got your whole… situation out,” I waved vaguely at her, refusing to be specific because my brain was already doing too much. “—You got a death wish?”

She smirked. “You worried about me or them?”

“Both??” I snapped. “Put it back on.”

She ignored me completely.

For a solid minute, we went back and forth with her forcing the shirt over my head while I half resisted, half… I ain’t really try that hard…

Next thing I knew, I was standing there in her shirt, her hands fixing it down like she dressing a child.

“Stay still,” she muttered.

“I am still— you just doing too much,” I grumbled, but I ain’t move.

And then she handed me her zip-up hoodie too.

I glared. “Now what the hell am I, a lost and found bin??”

“It matches,” she said simply, adjusting the hoodie on me. “You’ll be fine.” Her fingers brushed through my hair, fixing it like she had a license to do that.

I swatted her hand away on reflex—then immediately grabbed onto her arm.

Clutched it, actually.

“Just…stay by the booth,” I muttered, not looking at her.

She hummed, letting me drag her out the bathroom and back toward the event. The group was already there, loud as hell like nothing in life bothered them.

Essence looked over first. Specifically—at my arm hooked around Aries’.

Her smile flickered, then she waved.

I gave her a little wave back, forcing it, But the second I let go of Aries’ arm, her smile got wider. Too wide at that.

I rolled my eyes and looked away.

Yeah, she making it real obvious. At least pretend you got shame?

“Awwww,” Khalil slid up beside me. “Not her giving you her clothes.”

I pinched the skin on his arm with zero hesitation. Hard as hell.

“Ow!? What the fuck!?” he jumped back, clutching his arm.

“That’s what you get—”

My eyes darted over to Essence practically caressing Aries’ arm like she was reading braille.

“I love those flowers too, oh my gosh,” she said, all soft and sweet.

Aries nodded, turning her arm so she could see better.

Oh. So now we giving tours??

I looked away quick, my chest tightenin’. I shoved my hands deep into Aries’ zip-up hoodie pockets, shoulders tensing.

“Yo, can y’all help me grab the rest of the boxes?” Khalil called.

I shook my head immediately, droppin’ into the foldable chair right next to Aries like I paid rent there. “Hell nah.”

Chelsea, Britney, and Imani went off with Khalil, leavin’ me stuck with Essential oils and Aries.

They started jokin’—well…Essence started laughin’ at everything Aries said.

I frowned.

I done heard Aries be actually funny before. With me, and right now? She up here recycling jokes like it’s Earth Day. What the hell is this performance???

“I’m finna go help Khalil,” Aries said after a minute, glancin’ at her phone. “He said he’s having trouble.”

Finally, some peace, silence, and sanity.

But no, Egg roll stayed.

“you real comfortable,” I said slick, not even lookin’ at her.

“I ain’t the one uncomfortable,” she shot back, turnin’ to face me, expression deadpan.

I jerked my head back, my face twistin’. “Girl—who the hell is you talkin’ to?”

She raised a brow slowly, tuckin’ her hair behind her ear like she had time today. “Don’t act like you ain’t just opened your mouth first.”

Oh!

So she got attitude too??

Cute.

I stood up, crossin’ my arms. “I speak to who the hell I wanna speak to. The fuck?”

She hummed, lips curvin’ into a small smile like she found me amusing. “Exactly,” she said. “And I say what the fuck I wanna say.”

She looked me up and down real quick. “Girl, you too pretty to be doin’ all that.”

She think she funny, huh.

I rolled my eyes so hard I almost saw my own thoughts.

She walked off like she ain’t just said that. And right on cue—Aries came back, carryin’ a box as Essence leaned into her, whisperin’ something in her ear.

Aries leaned down to hear her, noddin’ then walkin’ over to me, setting the box down with a small huff.

Yeah, okay.

“That’s the type of girls you be hangin’ around?” I blurted before I could stop myself.

She blinked, confused. “Who?”

“Vanilla Essence,” I mocked.

She sighed immediately, pinchin’ the bridge of her nose like she was already tired of me.

“What’d you do?” she asked.

I sucked my teeth. Hard.

My jaw tightened. “Why you always assuming I did something??”

She just looked at me.

That look.

“I ain’t do shit, Aries!” I huffed. “I just asked her why she so comfortable.”

“‘Cause she’s chill,” Aries said simply, shrugging.

I let out a sharp huff. “And you ain’t been doin’ shit lately. Do your fuckin’ job.”

There it go. I should’ve shut up the second it left my mouth.

I knew it was foul. But I still ain’t take it back.

Her expression shifted.

“First you tell me fuck off,” she said, voice tightening, “now you telling me do my job?”

I rolled my eyes. “so?”

“No—” she shook her head. “Which one is it for you, Londyn??”

I snapped. “Do your job and stop eye-fucking every girl you see!?”

She went still then slowly glanced around at the people nearby.

She pinched the bridge of her nose again like she was fighting for her life not to say something crazy. “Let’s talk somewhere else, Londyn,” she said low, reaching for my hand.

I shoved her and she barely moved. Which pissed me off more.

“We wouldn’t be having this conversation if you wasn’t steady in every bitch face—”

“Why you acting like you care!?” she cut in.

“Maybe because I do!?” I shouted, my chest heaving.

And then—I went too far, loud enough for heads to turn.

“But fuck that!” I added, voice sharp. “At the end of the day, you just paid to be here. So tighten up, nigga.”

She stepped back and her face went blank.

“Aight,” she said flatly then walked right past me.

That felt worse than anything.

I glanced around and noticed people starin’. “Do we have a problem??”

Heads snapped away quick before I stormed off, leavin’ that corny ass booth behind like I ain’t just embarrassed myself publicly.

I found Chelsea and Khalil not too far off after takin’ a short walk to cool off, But Khalil looked like he just ran a marathon, bent over, trying to catch his breath while Chelsea looked stressed.

“What’s wrong with y’all?” I frowned.

Khalil jerked his thumb behind him. “Aries—” he wheezed. “Got into it with some dude… and a girl… about you.”

My stomach dropped. “What?? Why??”

“Some girl said she heard you talking crazy at the booth a few minutes ago,” Chelsea said quickly. “That shit spread fast.”

I groaned. “We got into an argument—”

“Girl, you better fix that shit,” Chelsea cut in. “She took a punch to the face for you.”

My brain stalled. “She what?”

“She got hit, Londyn,” Khalil added, finally standing up straight. “She stood there arguing too.”

“Nigga started swinging. She ain’t even hesitate.’ He went on.

I didn’t even know what to do with that, ’cause even after telling her to “do her job” like she wasn’t a whole person standing in front of me. She still had my back. Didn’t think twice. Didn’t let it slide. And I don’t even know why…

She could’ve minded her business, but she didn’t.

And I hated how unfamiliar that felt.

Having someone…care like that.

What the fuck are you supposed to do with that? That’s the part that don’t make sense to me. People don’t just… do that.

Not for me at least.

I swallowed hard, running a hand over my face. 

I hate this feeling. I can’t even control my temper, and saying sorry? Yeah, that ain’t exactly my strong suit.

“Fuck,” I muttered, already moving. “Okay.”

I brushed past them quick, heart racing for a completely different reason now.