Chapter 15

Yelenas pov:
We fell asleep. We were so tired after working to get yn and peter away from david. We drifted off after an hour. It was the best sleep ive had in days, despite how uncomfortable the sofa is. We wake up to shuffling and a loud bang. Natasha moves first, warily keeping me behind her. She knocks on yns door and it quickly swings open as yn barges past us into the bathroom. She tucks her hair behind her ears as she empties her stomach. Natashas shoulders relax and im immediately by yns side, holding her hair back and i place a supportive hand on her back. “We’re here yn, its okay.”

“Im sorry” she collapses back, leaning limply against the bath. She rubs her hands down her face, trying to hide her shame. I give her a small smile and speak in a gentle tone.

“Hey no, you dont need to apologise. Besides its your bathroom that youre ruining.” She lets out a soft chuckle, tears welling in her eyes.

“God did i really tell you that stuff about…you know whats bothering me?” She scrunches her nose, embarassed.

“You mean struggling with mental health? Yeah you did, and im glad. Im your friend its my job to help you when you struggle.” I kneel next to her and put my hand on her shoulder, running it down her arm slowly.

Nat looks between us and smirks before speaking, “Secret struggles isnt the only thing you revealed.” I see the colour drain from her face along with her gentle smile.

“Oh god, what did i do? Did i flash you? This is why i dont drink.” Me and nat just glance at each other before i start belly laughing. I literally slap my knee and she just gives me a more worried look. “Okay, seriously, what did i do?”

“Yn, what have you done before? I thought you didnt drink because of your dad. Why did you immediately jump to flashing people?” The corners of her mouth nervously twist upward as a light blush fills her cheeks.

“Soooo, in highschool, i got drunk. A lot. I have a few- okay many- embarassing stories, that we dont have time to share now.” I raise my eyebrows and my mouth falls open.

“Huh. I thought you were a bit of a stick in the mud, but you just get more interesting.” She goes to speak but rushes back to the toilet, heaving. She eventually falls back to the same spot.

“Well thats pretty. So seriously what did i do?” Me and nat glance towards each other unsure when she smirks at me.

“I walked in on you making out with yel.” She lets out an embarassed groan and covers her face with her hands. “She claims you kissed her, but im not convinced.” Nat leans over looking at something before letting out a deep chuckle. “Then again, i think the hickey on her neck speaks for itself.” She lets out another shocked groan and burys her face into her knees. I quickly stand up and look in the mirror seeing it just under my jaw. My heart quickens and i get a weird feeling low in my stomach.

“Shit. Thats gonna raise some questions at the compound.” She hugs the toilet again but quickly sits back down.

“False alarm. Sorry about all of whats happened by the way. I get…disasterous when i drink.” I smirk at that. She had to have some flaws, but this isnt one. I love unhinged people, especially the pretty ones who make out with me. Nat finally finds a light switch and yn sucks in a breath, painfully. She reaches up to her head with a shaky hand.

“Ill grab you some pain relief, where do you guys keep it?” She shakes her head.

“We dont. I try not to keep a stash in case pete went down the same mental road as me.” Oh. I didnt realise it was that bad. I give her a reassuring smile when nat speaks up.

“Theres a store around the corner from here. I can grab some. Just try to refrain from making out while im gone.” I chuck a nearly empty bottle of shampoo at her.

“HEY! Theres still shampoo in that. Do you know how expensive shampoo is these days?” My throat tightens when i remember how much she paid for and how much shes struggling. Nat leaves and we look at each other awkwardly. “Well, should we discuss the hickey in the room?” I let out a soft chuckle. She always knows how to make things less awkward.

“What do you wanna talk about?”

“Im so sorry i kissed you, i dont know what came over me.” I rub my hands over the back of my neck.

“If it makes you feel better, nat walked in on us because i kissed you back.” Blush creeps up her neck but she smirks.

“Yeah im starting to recall some wandering hands too.” I flinch a little, not expecting her to remember. “Did i really say that your accent makes me want to and then kiss you?” A faint smile wanders on to my lips.

“Why do we keep kissing each other?” She holds up a finger and scoffs.

“At least i did it whilst under the influence of alcohol.”

“Not the first time!” She knits her eyebrows and scoffs even louder.

“You took me to a bar, remember?” I smile and i can feel the bad idea building in my chest. I suck in a nervous breath while she brushes her teeth.

She spits out the toothpaste and when she turns to me to talk, we’re dangerously close. “Im sorry to keep you guys here all day.” She whispers it like she could break the moment with a single sound. My hand finds her waist and i lean in close, my lips brushing her ear when i whisper breathlessly.

“Maybe i should fix it and kiss you now we’re both sober.” Her breath hitches. Her hands fly up to my shirt as she pulls me closer and kisses me. Her lips warm my skin as she moves to my neck again. This is less tamed, desperation, starved. Her hands pull my shirt up over my head and my fingers brush her skin near her waistband. I can feel her goosebumps before i pull her top up, successfully removing it this time. The bruises make me doubt myself for a moment and i pause. She rolls her eyes and tips my chin up towards her.

“Kiss me dummy.” Thats all it takes. I lose what little composure i have left. My hands run wild up her body, trailing every inch of her. I pull down her trousers and wait for her to nod before i lift her onto the counter and move her black lace underwear to the side and insert two fingers. She lets out a small satisfied breath and i slowly move them, increasing the pace slightly. She breathlessly kisses my collarbone and my thumb swirls her swollen clitoris. She stifles a moan and slightly digs her nails into my arm. Her leg shakes slightly when i increase the speed and she buries her face into my shoulder to muffle the beautiful sound. She tightens around my fingers and i smirk at her when i hear the front door justle open.

“Hey, it took me a minute to find the meds and i got a case of water too, figured shed be thirsty.” Our eyes widen and she pulls up her trousers and we both put on our shirts just in time. She comes in and looks between us, suspicion wild in her eyes. She narrows her eyes. “Why do you both look so warm?”

“I have a hangover. The sweating can get worse when i havent drank for a while.” She plays it off smoothly and i remember another reason i like her so much.

“I have been searching for pain meds, shes been complaining and claimed she might have some in her room or the living room.” She touches her head, faking pain when she feigns offence.

“I dont complain. I just dont feel great right now.” Nat shakes her head, hopefully believing the lie when she passes the bag of water and meds to yn. “Thank you, you absolute goddess!” She quickly chugs the water with the pills. She finishes a bottle and places it on the ground, giving a sheepish grin when she sees us looking. “What? Im dehydrated. Its the hangover, leave me alone.”

“We didnt- we didnt say anything.” Nat smirks and i clear my throat.

“Sorry, i really need to pee, do you guys mind?”

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Yns pov:
We awkwardly sit in my room, her on the chair to my desk, me on my bed. She keeps glancing at me.

“So what did you guys do while i was gone?” She knows. I rub the back of my neck, i never was good at hiding my nerves. I just hope she doesnt notice the blush spreading up my cheeks.

“Uhh we mostly sat in silence, you know with the headache and all. I also apologised profusely for the uh kissing.”
She hums and tries to hide a smirk.

“Yeah and that other hickey forming on yels neck is from what?” I sigh in embarassment and cover my face.

“Sorry, that must be a late bruise from my drunken antics.” She narrows her eyes but lets it go.

“We all get drunk you know. Its nothing to be embarassed about.” I shake my head but hold onto my quilt, quickly feeling motion sick. Im definitely having a bath when lena comes back.

“Do you all make out with your best friend?” She chuckles and spins the chair side to side.

“Okay maybe not, but we all do embarassing stuff. Besides yel will swear me to secrecy about that kiss.” Yelena opens the door and i quickly stand up, moving about a few things in my wardrobe.

“Im going in the bath, ill see you guys in like 30 minutes, an hour maybe.” I grab a towel and head in. I run the bath and let out a small, tired sigh. When the bath is full and the water is warm, i get in. I try to relax but the room spins and i feel the sick sitting at the back of my throat. Oh god i feel sea sick. I only got in the bath. I quickly wash my body and my hair, being careful not to move too quickly.

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Yelenas pov:
“What did you say to her? We’re meant to be helping her, not making fun.” She opens her mouth, offence covering her face.

“I didnt say anything! I asked her what you guys got up to while i was gone and when she answered, she grabbed her blanked. Im guessing she started to feel sick which is why she went in the bath.”

I guess thats a reasonable answer. I look around the room, taking note of the desk and old desk chair i didnt notice before. Nat tilts her head and speaks in a gentle tone. “Everything okay yel?”

“Yeah its just…i realise now why she wants me to make my room more personal. She never had a room that didnt look like a halloween torture house.” I look pointedly at the blood stains and dented walls. Sadness flashes in her eyes and i continue. “She hasnt got anything personal here. I mean theres that bat, but she said her dad hit her with one and im guessing its that one.” We sit in a heavy silence, just listening to the sounds of other tenants speaking and arguing.

Suddenly the bathroom door opens and yn strolls out, looking a little pale and with a towel wrapped around her. I cant help but look at her, the towel outlines her body perfectly. To think what we were doing just half an hour ago. It plays through my head again and its a very welcome memory. She holds a steadying hand on the doorframe and holds her other hand flush to her mouth.

“Okay, it turns out that when you have a bath with a hangover, you start to feel sea sick.” Nat throws her head back with laughter. I have never seen that.

“I have never heard of that being a thing.” She keeps laughing and swipes away tears. I stand up and drag her out to let yn get dressed. The faint smell of coconut drives me mad as i walk past her. It makes me want to kick nat out and carry on where we got interrupted.

“So whats the protocol here?” She gives me a weird questioning look and folds her arms. “When is it safe to leave?” She raises a single eyebrow, looking at me with those judgemental eyes.

“Shes your bestfriend and you cant wait to get out of here? Huh cant imagine whats sparked that.” Her sentence is dripping with sarcasm. My expression is plain and annoyed.

“Its not like that, i think she might want some space and im starting to get hungry.”

“Im sure they have food.” I stand up and confidently waltz over to the cupboards dramatically opening each one before reaching the fridge. Each one is emptier than the last. The little that is there is mostly alcohol. “Oh my god, wheres their food?”

“They’re broke, remember?  She cant afford marshmallows for hot chocolates either, its criminal.” She presses her lips into a tight line, attempting to keep her composure.

“Well we cant leave her here with very limited food.” I tap the counter impatiently before letting the cupboard doors fall shut with a loud bang.

“She wont let us do that. Shes very self reliant. Believe me if i could help her, i would.” Her mouth twitches, clearly not happy with my answer.

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Yns pov:
I hear a loud bang and quickly put on the jumper yelena let me borrow before i quickly head out. The room is thick with tension as my eyes flicker between them. “Whats going on?” Nats eyes sweep over me, pointedly dragging over my jumper as she smirks.

“Lose your own clothes yn?” My ears flush pink as i look at where the blood spatter used to be.

“I heard a bang, i threw on the first thing i saw. Did you guys clean?” Yelena nervously fidgets, unsure where to put her hands. She moves them from her hips to the counter and then decides to fold them, before placing her hands back on the counter.

“That sounds bad, we just didnt want you to see the blood again. You spiralled and got drunk last time.” I look at the second bruise forming on her neck. Im guessing nat hasnt yet informed her of that. Maybe i should be more careful from now on. What is wrong with me? Shes my friend, this will never happen again.

“Thank you. So when are you guys headed back? I dont want to take up your whole day.” Nat shakes her head and goes to grab her jacket.

“Dont worry about it, im gonna head to the shop, you want anything?” Thats probably not a good idea. Me and yel cannot be trusted alone right now.

“I have food, thanks though.” Yelena scoffs and tilts her head.

“You call that food?”

“You need to stop routing through my apartment.” She shrugs her shoulders flashing me a smile. I know what shes thinking about. Theres a counter in front of her just like the one i was sat on in the bathroom.

“M-maybe we should all go shopping then. Just let me put my hair up.” I can feel yelenas eyes dragging over my body as i walk out. She has no shame. I quickly put my damp hair in a messy bun and walk into the living room. We head to natashas fancy car and i slide into the back seat. “Woah, i forgot how fancy this thing is.” She chuckles and looks at me in the rear view mirror.

“At least someone appreciates it, yel keeps saying how its ‘impractical’.”

“How much did you pay for this thing?” She smirks and has a playful tone in her voice.

“Its was free. Tony lost a bet. He thought it would take longer for me to get with wanda than for him to get with steve.” My eyes widen and i grab onto her seat, nearly lunging into the front of the car to see her.

“I KNEW IT! I knew you were all dating!”
She laughs and yelena just sits in quiet surprise, amusement playing on her lips.

“Yeah well none of us were supposed to know. Everyone likes to keep things secret in the compound because we’re always around each other. Its nice to have something a little more private.” I think about the possible science and psychology behind what makes them work so well as a team. Theyre so different but they work so well together. Its honestly a miracle. I slowly sit back, the cogs still turning and a look of amusement shows on their faces. 10 minutes later nat pulls up outside a store. We head inside and they start to look around and put things in the trolley. I look but guilt gnaws at my insides. I feel sick sitting at the back of my throat. I cant take their money. I cant get anything. I just watch the floor, pretending to shop. I dont want to be tempted by looking.

“Anything you want parker?” I shake my head and nat clearly isnt convinced. “Come on, you need groceries.”

“I have alcohol. And if i go to work, i can steal some of alexs food.” Yelena rolls her eyes and natasha stops walking, sensing the small tension.

“First of all, alcohol may have calories, but its not food. And who the hell is alex?” Yelena scoffs again at his name and i nudge her with my elbow.

“Hes my friend. Yelena has something against him that i dont understand.” Nats jaw tightens and she looks away.

“Oh. Hes the one who told your dad that youre gay.” I swallow hard. My throat feels tight as i think about what happened.

“Yeah. He is. But he is the only other friend ive had since i got arrested the first time.” I look to yelena but she still wont look at me.

“Pick some food yn, tonys paying.” I shake my head and put my hands up to stop her from talking.

“No, i have like $10 im good, i can buy food, thanks though.” Nat grabs the trolley, stopping us from moving. She doesnt say anything, she just doesnt move. We stand there for 5 minutes before anyone speaks. “Sooo. Why are we just stood here?”

“We’re waiting for you to pick up some food. At least some snacks.” I scoff and try to play it off as a chuckle, but she doesnt move a muscle. Doesnt even change her facial expression. I hesitantly look at the shelves and thr prices. I slowly pick up some cheap chocolate and hesitantly place it in the trolley. Natasha smiles triumphantly but still doesnt move. “Great now what else do you want?”

“You said i only had to pick one thing!” My voices goes slightly higher oitched and an exasperated look finds it way on to my face.

“Yeah, i lied. Im a spy, what can i say.” She folds her arms as she exudes pride.

“Shes also such a mom. She wont let anyone go hungry.” Nat smacks lenas arm, her usual annoyed look returning to her face.