Chapter 38

FUCK YEAHHHHH HAPPY EARLY PRIDE MONTHHH 👹

later that night, the tension was like a pimple. one that was coiled so tightly with tension that a single wrong movement could pop it. (a/n creds to my irl frens for describing our friend group that way 🥹) the door clicked shut as lara joined the group at the dining table, tentatively selecting the seat farthest from megan. all six girls were picking at their meals, with the exception of manon who was animatedly sharing stories about spoon.

manon was halfway through a story about spoon attempting to fight a vacuum cleaner when she slowly realized nobody was listening. again.

“…and then he launched himself directly at it like it had personally insulted his ancestors.”

silence. manon looked around the table. sophia was eating. yoonchae was trying very hard to look anywhere except the obvious problem.

dani was poking at her food. lara looked like she was one mildly irritating comment away from committing a felony.

and megan? megan was staring at dani. still. she hadn’t stopped, not even to blink.

“megan.”

no response.

“megan.”

nothing.

“megan.”

“what?” megan snapped, not even looking away.

“stop staring.”

“i’m not staring.”

“you’ve been looking at her for twelve minutes.”

“i have not.”

“you literally have.”

“i was listening to the conversation.”

“there is no conversation.”

lara looked like she wanted to throw her plate through a window. dani could feel megan’s eyes on her. every time she looked down. it wasn’t angry or accusatory. if anything, it was worse.

because megan looked like she was devouring every inch of dani.

like she was checking every few seconds to make sure dani was actually there.

finally, dani sighed.

“megan.”

the room immediately fell silent.

megan straightened.

“yeah?”

“why are you looking at me like that?”

for the first time all evening, megan seemed caught off guard.

“i…” her jaw worked for a second. “i don’t know.”

that was somehow the most honest answer she could’ve given, because she really didn’t. she just knew that for weeks she’d been imagining dani everywhere.

on the couch.

in the studio.

walking through hallways.

sitting beside her.

laughing in rooms she wasn’t actually in.

every time she’d looked, dani had vanished.

now she was here.

actually here.

and some irrational part of megan’s brain still seemed convinced that if she looked away, dani would disappear again.

dani stared at her.

the honesty in that answer hit harder than she expected.

“oh.”

across the table, yoonchae suddenly became fascinated by her napkin.

sophia looked seconds away from developing a migraine.

manon was witnessing live television.

lara looked murderous.

“can you stop?” lara finally said.

everyone froze.

megan’s eyes immediately slid away from dani and landed on her.

lara leaned back in her chair.

“what?”

“you’re being weird.”

“okay.”

“no, seriously. it’s pathetic.”

the room went very still.

dani’s shoulders tensed instantly.

sophia put her fork down.

manon sat up straighter.

even yoonchae’s expression hardened.

but megan spoke first.

quietly.

dangerously quietly.

“don’t.”

lara laughed once.

“what? am i wrong?”

“don’t.”

the warning was sharper this time.

lara opened her mouth again.

then stopped.

because megan wasn’t looking annoyed.

she wasn’t looking emotional.

she wasn’t even looking angry.

she looked done.

completely.

utterly.

done.

and for the first time since this whole mess started, lara seemed to realize she might not actually have megan on her side anymore.

manon was halfway through describing how spoon had somehow managed to steal an entire loaf of bread off the counter without anyone noticing when the sound of a fork scraping against a plate made everyone flinch.

megan stared at dani from across the table.

and kept staring and staring, until sophia finally kicked her under the table.

“ow.”

“stop looking at her like you’re planning a murder.”

“i’m considering it.”

“megan.”

“allegedly.”

dani would’ve laughed a few months ago. instead, she kept her eyes fixed on her food. the silence stretched again.

manon cleared her throat. “…anyway. spoon stole the bread.”

nobody responded.

“guys.”

nothing.

“i’m trying really hard here.”

that finally earned a weak smile from yoonchae.

“we appreciate your service, unnie.”

“thank you.”

another pause.

manon sighed dramatically.

“okay, this is terrible. somebody say something.”

“something,” yoonchae supplied immediately.

“thank you, yoonchae.”

“you’re welcome.”

dani snorted before she could stop herself. the table froze. dani froze.

yoonchae’s eyes widened. manon’s mouth dropped open.

“did you—”

“but—”

“don’t.”

“you laughed.”

“manon.”

“she laughed.”

“manon.”

“EVERYBODY SHE LAUGHED—”

“MANON!”

everyone burst out laughing. even sophia. even yoonchae. and after a second, even dani. it only lasted a few moments. but it was enough for six girls who had been trapped by the emotional wreckages that made up one another. It was enough for some of the tension to loosen. enough for everyone to remember what normal felt like.

across the table, megan couldn’t stop looking at her. not in the desperate way she had before. not like she was waiting for dani to forgive her.

just…

looking.

because dani was smiling. small. tired. still hurting. but it was a milestone, and megan had missed that more than she wanted to admit.

megan’s smile faded first. not sadly. just softer.

“you look better,” she said quietly.

the words slipped out before she could stop them. the table immediately went silent again.

“oh my god,” sophia muttered.

“here we go,” manon whispered.

yoonchae buried her face in her hands. dani blinked, caught off guard.

“…thanks.”

megan nodded. and somehow that was worse. more awkward. because neither of them knew what to do after that. the feelings were still there. the hurt was still there. the conversation they needed to have was still waiting.

but for the first time in weeks, they were in the same room and nobody was running away. nobody was crying. nobody was slamming doors.

it wasn’t forgiveness. it wasn’t closure. it wasn’t even progress, really, but it was something. and sometimes something was enough. at least for one night.

under the table, yoonchae quietly texted sophia.

child 💅

they survived 3 minutes without crying

sophia glanced at her phone.

sexy maternal figure 💅

new world record

yoonchae nearly choked on her water. the realization visibly rattled her. the silence that followed was suffocating. then dani stood. immediately, five heads turned toward her.

“…i found my journal,” she said quietly.

nobody had even noticed it sitting beside her chair.

“i should probably go.”

the atmosphere shifted instantly.

megan’s face fell. just slightly.

enough that dani noticed.

enough that everyone noticed.

yoonchae pushed her chair back too.

“i’ll drive you.”

dani nodded.

“okay.”

as they started gathering their things, megan’s hands clenched under the table.

she wanted to say something.

anything. sorry. stay. can we talk? are you okay?

instead, all that came out was—

“…bye, dani.”

dani paused near the doorway. for a second, nobody breathed. then she looked back.

“bye, megan.”

it wasn’t much.

just two words.

but judging by the way megan stared at the closed front door for the next ten minutes after dani left, it was enough to keep her alive for at least another week.