Chapter 9

My mind goes blank for a minute or two as I clutch the bottle in my hand, clenching my jaw as her soft laughter rings in my ear, her dark hair blurring my sight, and hand choking the air out of me.

I run a hand down my face roughly and huff a breath trying to clear my head and escape those realistic memories. I suddenly felt too light headed and brain dead to think. How much had I drunk?

“Quick question-” I pause to gather my words “Why use your mouth for talking when you can be using it for something better?” I suggest, trying to avoid the topic I’ve started by mistake. And also wanting Sparks drunk and quiet.

However, when I look back at her, her smile suggests that she might have gotten the message differently… Waaay differently. She’s a little naughty, isn’t she?

“I meant to drink, fuck” I laugh and twist the cap of another bottle for her but instead she grabs my already half-drunk bottle and takes a swig of it still laughing at her own dirty thoughts.

“Tell me about her” she pushes on.

I have so many regrets in my life, but starting this conversation is among the top three. I bet it’s what made me feel like throwing up suddenly. The bile rising up my throat quicker than Sonic. Hold it in nine, throwing up isn’t attractive.

“Well first, she was nice and didn’t take drinks from me” I mumble “She drunk when I asked her to, and shut the hell up when required to” my gaze is stuck in the dark sky that had her eyes twinkling. It’s doing nothing for me.

“She was no fun” Flame pouts, faking disappointment.

“Well, now you know” I gulp down the drink I’d opened for her to try and wash down the pain I’d just aroused together with the weird drowsy feeling it came with.

“Whoa slow down.” Flame’s voice echoes sounding distorted and chopped but I don’t have time to decode that when there’s something heavy sitting on my chest limiting my breathing. I need to breath. I need fucking air-

“Well shit… I think I need to get some air” I slur blinking several times when I realize how blurry the city lights are now.

“Well, we’re already outside Cain so feel free” she laughs mockingly and I finish the last drop of my drink gritting my teeth then look at her.

What the fuck was funny?

“I know, but your presence is chocking me Hayley” I grit as my t-shirt suddenly tightens around my neck. Effects of being around her toxic space.

“Pardon me?” her tone is sharp now and she sounds offended.

I blink hard again trying to clear my blurry sight and thoughts then look at the confused lady in front of me. Sparks is looking at me like I’m crazy, eyebrows furrowed, a small cringe on her face. Shit.

“Ugh sorry” I chuckle trying to seem normal but all I could hear is her mocking laughter at the back of my head. See her wide smile, feel her clawing hands, smell her suffocating perfume. I rub my neck, desperate to get some air.

“Are you okay?” Flame tilts her head eyeing me and huff out some air.

I wasn’t really sure at the moment. I thought I was done having flashbacks of her. Before I met my boys, I used to take pills just to allow her to keep me company. Rot in anger and self-loathing she always fed me so well. Her flashbacks always seem so real too.

But I mean I only had three bottles, they’re not enough to take me back there or even make me drunk for that matter.

“You’re already drunk” Flame points out as she studies me.

“No, I can’t be. I just… I- I… ha-” I stop mid-sentence, speechless and also to confirm how much I’ve drunk.

I look next to me at the bottles lying there… Damn, they are so many, about a hundred? Hmm, that explains it. And they’re colorful, lines of colors dancing together.

What beer is this anyway? “I… My head feels like a coconut.” I slap the back of my head.

“What?” Flame laughs “You sure you’re not drunk?”

“Well, is it?”

Were we in a cave? There was an echo after every word I spoke, my head was so heavy… Like a coconut, are coconuts heavy? Why did it feel like a coconut?

I pick one of the many, colorful bottles on the ground, and chug the drink down. ‘Fight fire with fire’ they say, plus I was curious on how the drink in the white bottle tasted.

Same as the rest, fucking disappointing. I needed to find Austin and tell him about this. He needed to see the colorful bottles.

With that thought, I try to stand up taking my sweet time but I stumble back a bit losing my balance. I never really have balance though, drunk or sober.

“I think you should sit, can I get you some water?” I open my eyes and look at her. My sight still unclear. I have to tell you, I’m getting worried I’ll have to start wearing glasses after tonight.

Unbelievable. She messed me up and now she acts like she cares? Fucking unbelievable. I don’t want her poisoned water.

“Why the fuck are you talking to me?” I rub a palm down my sweaty face trying to clear my sight and calm my ragged breath. I needed to be on alert around her.

I try to turn around and find the door out of here. I really needed to find Austin now and not just to tell him about the colored drinks I’ve had. He needed to know she was here.

“Wh-what the fuck is wrong with you?” she asks. She really some nerve speaking to me like she didn’t fuck me up on purpose.

“Me?! What’s wrong with me?!” it takes a moment unstable on my feet but I finally turn around to face her. “What’s wrong with you, Hayley?” I point Hayley, my wobbly feet giving up as I stumble back. How pathetic.

FLAME’S POV
With her breath reeking of whatever alcohol she chugged like water she yells to my face. A-and she calls me Hayley. Who the fuck is Hayley? She seems convinced I’m this strange girl as she glares right at me.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, calm down Cainine you’re drunk and not on your right mind right now. You just need a glass of water then I’ll drive you home, okay?” I explain looking down at the bottles of beer that were still lying there on the floor.

She only had three and I don’t think this was enough to get her to act like this. On the other hand, she said she was never sober so maybe she had had more before? It was still weird, was alcohol enough to make one hallucinate?

It takes a moment as I watch her stumble to the door, mumbling to herself like a crazy person. But I recall earlier in the kitchen when she asked me to come drink with her and chugged some foreign drink on the counter top.

Rule number one of these parties, never ever take a drink from someone you don’t know. She on the other hand, who I thought would know better than to drink some mystery drink from the counter top ignored that. She didn’t know if it was spiked or poisoned even. All in all, I think that drink had something in it, something that causes hallucinations?

Now here we were. Me on a roof top, with crazy Cainine.

“Are you kidding me?” she yells again snapping me back to reality “You’re the last person I would want to go anywhere with.”

The fuck did I do? I mean I know we’re not exactly friends but still-

She stumbles back tripping on her own feet but holds onto the wall and I release a breath I was holding. I needed to get her out of here and quick. Or we would be on the news with me as the number one suspect.

“You’re not on your right mind” I try to be rational with her. “Come with me for fuck’s sake.”

“Nothing will ever make what you did to me right Hayls. I loved you” her voice cracks and I notice her dark eyes turning teary. Bloody hell.

Who was Hayley? I mean I knew there was a whole story behind Cainine, the typical dyke and most known fuck girl in Lorenzo Falls but now I was interested to know more.

“Cainine-“

“And now you’re calling me Cainine, by that stupid name” she whines her voice shaky as she pushes her dark blue short hair back.

“I-” she looks so lost, defeated, heartbroken even and I don’t know what to do “Come on.” This is not how I was expecting this night to go at all. I thought I’d sit with her as she got tipsy and embarrass herself with trauma stories like I embarrassed myself last time by puking in her mouth. Okay, I didn’t puke in her mouth, but I kissed her-

“No” she squeaks like a broken child. “Why should I? Why should I trust you?”

Fuck, I can’t believe it but seeing her like this makes me feel bad for her. She just looks so hurt right now, different from the cocky woman I see, smirking at everything in a skirt. That kind of makes me want to hold her and tell her it’ll be okay… What? I have heart. Plus, broken Cainine is kind of attractive.

“Because I have no reason to lie to you…” I say and realize how dumb it sounds “Because you’re not okay and I want to take care of you” I correct myself. She did clean me up and give me a place to say last time.

“I’m fine. I can handle myself.”

She staggers backwards again and I basically jump to grab her hand to prevent her from falling. But it’s too late, by the time I grab her wrist, she’s already halfway down landing on her back with a groan and taking me along with her.

“Shit…” a string of curses leave her mouth and I, a little angry lift my head from her chest and glare up at her.

If she just listened to me, she wouldn’t have fallen on her back and probably hurt herself. I fell on top of her probably adding more weight to her injuries.

“Fuuuuck” she groans her eyes snaking around my waist.

When my eyes finally meet hers, she stops cursing, her focus on me now.

Bloody hell. Was she hurt? Dying maybe… I knew it.

“Are you okay? Did you hit your head on the ground?” I ask trying to push off her chest but her arm tighten around me, holding me in place. I’m worried because if she died, I’d be the number one suspect, she was last seen with me. I don’t want to be part of a murder case.

She’s quiet for a minute or so, her dark eyes just boring into mine, deep in thought as if she’s trying to digest what I’ve just asked her and my heart rate starts increasing… Because she’s worrying me duh…

She sighs, her eyes taking me in before she finally speaks, “Holy hell, you’re perfect. I just- Your eyes, they’re amazing… Why?” She whispers and to my amusement, I can hear the awe in her tone and see it in her distant, stormy, grey eyes.

I understand she’s drunk and probably doesn’t know what she’s saying but this is the craziest question I’ve ever been asked. I hated to admit that it was kind of cute.

“I don’t know” I whisper back and watch as her eyes slowly take me in. I look back at her finally having time to concentrate on her now that we were close. I have never seen such cold, grey eyes in my life. They were so… different. My eyes trail her face down to her lips and I regret it almost immediately when I recall that night. The overwhelming feeling of being kissed by her. No wonder she was yearned for. She knows how to make someone feel wanted and kind of special.

“You can’t be real” she whispers softly and I meet her eyes again. I watch her eyes settle back on my lips and I feel her shudder, her hold tightening around my waist, and I fist her shirt. What can I say? The night breeze was pretty… Breezy.

“Chills… Fucking chills. That’s what you’re giving me.” Her voice is so soft I find myself leaning closer to her.

It was with this girl that I saw this look of awe in her eyes whenever she looked at me. No one’s looked at me like this, like I was some precious gem. But then again, she was drugged. She probably still thought I was that Hayley girl.

“Huh?” She’s somehow fucking with my thoughts I can’t think straight. But then again, who could when she was looking at you like that?

When her weirdly tempting scent of weed, mint, and the liquor she had was clogging my brain. Somehow drowning me, drawing me in.

“You do things to me, make me feel things” she mutters, her eyes glued to mine. And I have no idea if she’s still hallucinating with that girl, but I just can’t bring myself to look away from her. What is going on with me? I mean she has an excuse, she’s drugged and hallucinating, what about me?

My eyes are caught by sudden movement and I watch as her tongue slowly darts out and she drugs it over her bottom lip, wetting it, before she sucks it into her mouth and bites on it. What is she doing? My whole body feels tense and the fact that my brain can’t notice that and get me to move is messed up.

I honestly want to move away and tell her to go find her friends but what comes out instead is “What things?” Her drugged mind is clearly contagious.

“I’ll show you…”

Before I can ask what, she means, I’m flipped over and she’s on top of me her eyes never leaving mine. How did it come to this for fuck’s sake? Why can’t I seem to want to stop it?

My breathing is already heavy, my heart racing just by her intense stare, and I want to push her away but all my bones have turned to jelly. And all I can do is look into her eyes which are hypnotizing me.

She sighs and allows me one my last breath, before I feel her cold, pillowy lips on mine. One minute she’s yelling at me like crazy and now this? Unfortunately, I find myself swinging my arms around her neck and welcoming the kiss, my lips screwing hers lustfully.

Last time’s kiss is nothing compared to this one and I can tell by the urgency, the lust. Last time she was a bit sober and had control over things but this time her need was driving her. This has me thinking of whether it’s really to allow this to happen, but my thoughts and doubts are interrupted and thrown away when she presses her body against mine, groaning as she hardens the kiss.

Her warm tongue runs over my bottom lip and she nibbles on it, forcing my lips to part with a whimper. And she doesn’t waste a second as she slips her tongue between my lips, tasting every corner of my mouth. I’m actually glad I didn’t drink and throw up tonight.

Cainine groans as she takes on a certain rhythm thrusting her tongue in my mouth, basically… Mouth fucking me?

Her fingers dig into my skin before she suddenly pulls away and it’s back to the intense stare again. I’m panting from the kiss, my chest heaving as I wait for her to start screaming again but speaks instead…

“Fuck, you’re driving me insane Sparks.”

Now, I was completely in my own world but not too deep to hear her say my name. So, she’s not hallucinating anymore?

“Hmm” I can only hum. Lost in her eyes and in the moment that I can’t want to end. It feels too good and I won’t give myself a break after. How the fuck am I allowing this to happen again?

“You’re so beautiful, you know that?” Cain breathes, her eyes trailing lower on my body making me gulp.

I would feel self-conscious right about now, but she looked at me as if I was perfect so I know she meant it. One of her hands leaves my waist, slowly molding my curves as she looks back into my eyes before I feel her fingers playing with the hem of my shit. Oh God.

Her hand slips beneath my shirt and I gasp, wincing at how cold her fingers are as she traces my torso.

“S-sorry” Cainine stammers and tries to take her hand away, but in the heat of the moment, I hold her in place, and push her hand back in.

I know I’ll regret this and probably hate myself for a couple of months, but it was too late now, I was too far gone.

**
This chapter and the next one were supposed to be one but it would be too long and who likes that?

Re-editor S.C here, how’s it going my fellow humans? hope you’re all good and feeling the same too, drop A comment and let me know how the chapter makes you feel, also vote please, it makes me feel special for some un-known reason, so if you hate me then don’t vote and fuck you for that, but if you don’t hate me as much then you know what to do… the next chapter’s gonna pop up, right about…