Chapter 2

But the strangest thing has to be the young man with the bouffant hair and the petite blonde girl sitting on the counter-top next to him. They’re both stuffing their faces with continental breakfast selections. They seem totally unperturbed by the groaning mob around them as she snarfs down donut-holes and he little balls of melon.

Bouffant pops another piece of honeydew into his mouth, shoots his hand up and waves. Blondie gives us a powdered sugar-lipped grin.

“Don’t be shy,” he says, waving us over. “There’s plenty to go around.”

My Valkyrie and I exchange a shrug, and make our way over to the couple, being careful to not disturb the mass of bodies gathered by the radio. Bouffant offers the plate of donuts, but I snag a piece of cantaloupe instead. “What are you two doing here?” I ask, my voice in a low whisper.

“Eating,” Blondie says, her mouth still full. Bouffant elbows her in the ribs and mumbles something about manners.

“Are you not worried about them?” Valkyrie wants to know, pitching her thumb toward the groaning mob congregating only a few feet away.

“They’re not hungry,” Blondie says.

“Honestly, girl. Manners.” Bouffant elbows her again.

“Watch it, bitch.” Amazingly, Boufant is not offended by this. Blondie breaks into a large powdered sugar-lipped grin as Bouffant throws an arm around her neck and pulls her in until her head is leaning on his shoulder.

“Who the fuck are you people?” I ask. “And why is your sense of self-preservation so far out of whack?”

“It’s OK,” Bouffant replies. “They like the music. They haven’t bothered us since we turned on the radio.”

“You know that’s the college station, right?”

They both look at me and shrug.

“I was the overnight DJ.”

Still, not a single glimmer of understanding in their eyes.

“The morning show guy never showed up,” I stare at them. “And this is the last song on the album.”

Finally, Bouffant and Blondie look at each other and share one of those oh, shit moments as the music is replaced by the gravelly thumps and crackles of the record coming to an end. But it’s what they do next that really surprises me.

As the thumps and crackles are gradually drowned out by a rising snarl from the mob, Bouffant and Blondie jump down from the counter-top and both take up fighting stances. My Valkyrie draws her foil, and there is a whirlwind of activity around me. I cover my head with my hands and try to hide as the melee ensues.

By the time I open my eyes again, the mob is laid out cold on the tile floor and my Valkyrie is congratulating the couple on their fighting skills. She assures them that they shall indeed find a place in Odin’s hall if they should ever fall in battle, but that she thinks that they have many more glorious days ahead of them.

I just shake my head and try to process everything that has happened.

Blondie comes over and rests her hands on my shoulders. “You OK? You look a little pale.”

“What the fuck was that?” I say. I realize I’m shaking just a little.

“Capoeira,” she says, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “Brazillian dance fighting.”

I hold my face in my hands. “Am I the only one around here that doesn’t know some kind of kung-fu sword-fighting shit?” The stress is proving too much, and I let out a small sob.

“It is alright, my sweet maiden.” Valkyrie sets her fencing foil down on the counter and immediately has me wrapped up in her arms. “I have sworn to protect you, and will do so until I die in battle, or until the day that you tire of me.”

“Thank you,” I say. I throw my arms around her neck and kiss her. It lasts a good five minutes, and when we’re done, Blondie and Bouffant just stare at us with their mouths agape.

“Damn girl, you’d better hang on to her.” That comment comes from Blondie, but I have no idea which one of us she is addressing. My mind is currently fixed on trying to figure out what’s going on with my Valkyrie as she once again pulls the Sharpie from her pocket, and makes a third red line on the skin of her forearm.

“What are you doing with all those marks?” I ask.

“I am keeping tally of how many times I have felt the earth move beneath my feet when you kiss me. When I get to five, I shall ask you to be my girlfriend. When I get to twenty, I shall seek your parents’ permission to ask for your hand in marriage.”

“Oh, you definitely want to hang on to her, girlfriend,” says Bouffant.

I reach up and plant another passionate kiss on my Valkyrie’s lips. I think maybe the earth just moved for me too. She has some really nice lips, and I think I fit nicely in the curve of her arms. “That’s four,” I say. “And my name is Hannah, by the way. I thought you should know that, since you’re going to be my girlfriend and all.”

“Ngomi,” she says, uncapping the Sharpie again.

“Ngomi the Valkyrie.” I smile. Ah well, not the weirdest thing that’s happened to me so far today. I let her finish the fourth hash mark before reaching up to plant the fifth kiss on her lips, sealing the deal. The kiss lasts another five minutes, and is accompanied by plenty of Brazillian tongue-dance fighting.

The four of us work together to gather provisions and discuss our immediate plans for survival. Ngomi is busy making coffee on the stovetop while Blondie, Bouffant, and I slap together sandwiches on the big stainless steel table that dominates the center of the large commercial kitchen.

I smile at my Valkyrie as she looks over her shoulder at me. None of the rest of us felt qualified to operate anything other than a Keurig, and I thought for sure I’d be going into caffeine withdrawal by now. But then Ngomi piped up and said she had seen coffee prepared many times over the fire in Odin’s hall, and volunteered to take care of it.

I think I’m beginning to like being her girlfriend. I blow her a little kiss and then turn my attention back to peanut butter and jelly duty. I get a nice warm feeling when I think about Ngomi the Valkyrie. I don’t know what the fuck is going on with all these snarling mobs dressed in suits and business casual, but at least I feel safe with the people in this room.

“So if you guys don’t go to school here, how did you get mixed up in this shit?” I ask the couple making sandwiches with me. “Did you know each other before this started?”

“Nah, I just stopped in to apply for financial aid when I met Johnny here,” Blondie says. “Isn’t he just the best?” She wraps her arms around Johnny’s arm and lays her head on his shoulder.

“I hate to break it to you sister, but your boyfriend’s about as queer as a two-dollar bill.” This gets me a look from Blondie that could curdle milk. “Sorry, but it’s true. I don’t think he’s going to be taking you to prom.”

She scrunches up her face and clenches the edge of the table as if she’s trying hard to decide whether or not she should lay me out on the floor like she did those snarling, shuffling things that were in here before.

“I’m sorry,” I say. “That was rude. I’m normally not like this. I’m just — I’ve been up all night and I’m exhausted. That’s no excuse, I know. Sorry.”

“You just need coffee, sweet girlfriend of mine. Then you will be alright.” Ngomi comes over with two steaming mugs that she places in front of Blondie and Bouffant, before turning to fetch one for herself and one for me.

Blondie thrusts her hand out to me. “I’m Sarah,” she says. “I’m going to be starting here in the fall.” She tilts her head toward Bouffant. “This is my friend Johnny, he’s here for the figure skating competition. If he places high enough, he’ll go on to Nationals, and then maybe the Olympic team.” Sarah puts her hands together in a moment of miniature applause as she shares the tale of Johnny’s figure skating glory.

“I’m Hannah,” I say, as I shake her hand and then Johnny’s. “And this is my girlfriend, Ngomi the Valkyrie. We haven’t been dating long …”

“One hour and ten minutes,” Ngomi says.

I smile. “But, she has assured me that I will have a place by her side in Valhalla. So I’ve got that going for me. Plus, she’s just the sweetest thing, and I absolutely fucking love her hair.” I lean over to give Ngomi a smooch on the lips. She tastes like coffee. And I’m not at all surprised when I see the cap come off of the red Sharpie marker. My parents are going to shit when I tell them how we met.

With the formal introductions out of the way, we begin to formulate our plan to stay alive. I tell them about the broadcast studio, and we all agree that it’s probably safe to use as a base, since the mob seems to be calmed by the sweet sounds of my vinyl selections. We gather up our coffee thermos and sandwiches, and make our way downstairs.

The mob that Ngomi first dispatched is nowhere to be seen, and fortunately they haven’t wandered into the studio either. It’s a tight fit with the four of us in here, but we are safe. I reach around and lock the door as we break out a round of sandwiches and discuss who will take the first watch.

Everyone seems to think that I should sleep first, since I’ve been up all night. Ngomi refuses to leave my side, so that settles it, we will sleep first while Johnny and Sarah take watch. As I show them how to operate the equipment and urge them to be careful with the precious vinyl, I’m wondering if I can even fall asleep with all the coffee I just put away.

The funky sounds of the Ohio Players fill the room momentarily before Johnny and Sarah don headphones to give Ngomi and me the chance to sleep. My beautiful Valkyrie touches her fingers to my cheek. “Sleep well my sweet sticky thing,” she says, mimicking the lyrics of the song we just heard the beginning of.

“Don’t think I can. Too much coffee.”

“I will keep you safe.” Ngomi begins running her fingertip slowly down my nose before picking it up and taking another run. “And I will help you sleep.”

I feel the softness of her lips on mine as she answers by planting another sensuous kiss on me. I don’t get a chance to see if the Sharpie comes out again, I’ve already closed my eyes.

In my dream, I’m standing under a gazebo in a beautiful outdoor space. My parents are there, as are Ngomi and her mom and dad. Some guy in a dark suit says, “You may now kiss the bride,” and we embrace. A cheer goes up from the crowd and the Ohio Players start in with Sweet Sticky Thing. I smile and hope that I will remember this moment when I wake.

“We’ve got a plan, sleepyhead,” Johnny says as he hands me a peanut butter sandwich. “Wanna hear it?”

I sit up and rub the back of my neck. “Mmm. How long was I out?”

“A while,” Sarah says. She offers me coffee, but I wave her off.

Ngomi comes around to sit on the floor behind me so that I find my backside nestled up between her legs while she wraps her strong arms around my waist. I settle my head back against her chest and smile. A girl could definitely get spoiled having a Valkyrie around.

I hear the soulful sounds of Maceo Parker’s saxophone drifting through the air as Johnny lays out the details of their plan. “Here’s the deal, people. We know that Jazz and Funk mellow them out. Everybody saw what happened in the kitchen, right?”

Nods from Ngomi and me. Rapt admiration from Sarah as she gazes upon him with star-struck eyes. “We’ll go out, three of us together for safety, and start turning on every radio we can find.”

“And the fourth person?” I ask.

“Somebody has to stay here and keep the music playing, otherwise we’re in trouble.”

“I already told you Johnathan, I will not go anywhere without my sweet American girlfriend.” Ngomi leans forward to kiss me on the back of my neck. I smile at her affectionate touch and the way she’s determined to come to my rescue all the time.

“Fine,” Johnny says. He’s clearly irritated. I don’t know if it’s Ngomi’s throwing a wrench in his plan, or the fact that she’s called him Johnathan, or if he’s just plain exhausted from everything that’s been going on for the past eighteen hours. “Fine. We’ll go in pairs.”