Chapter 29

I can’t get her text out of my head.

I’ve been staring at the board in chemistry for mote than fifteen minutes trying to concentrate on the equations and questions that have been scrawled out by the teacher, but my brain is failing to cooperate. I know that I should be attempting to answer them, knowing that my disorientation is not going unnoticed by my teacher and I will no doubt be called on to answer it in front of the class, but all I can think about is Mackenzie.

‘Let me take you on a proper date.’ – Mackenzie

The simple sentence is burned onto the inside of my eyelids, so even when I close my eyes I see her text, I break into a goofy smile that I hate myself for wearing. I just can’t help the way this girl makes me feel, and the strange looks that I’m getting off April as she sits beside me let’s me know that I’m being really obvious about it and I’ll have to tell her what’s going on. I sigh out of my nose and try and complete the equation I’m currently working on, occasionally side eyeing my best friend’s work when I get stuck.

It’s a shame Mackenzie isn’t any good at these kind of equations, we could’ve worked through them at my house later…

“Alex, what are you thinking about?” I hear April tease in my ear as she catches me in another one of my daydreams, and I finally snap out of the daze I was in, my cheeks flaming at her tone of voice. “You’ve spent more time this lesson in your head than in the actual lesson.”

I laugh slightly as I free my phone from my back pocket, sliding it over the table discreetly so that our chemistry teacher Mr. Hudson doesn’t see. April turns on my screen and her eyes nearly bug from her sockets, widening my smile as she snaps her head to me with a killer smile on my face. “Well, now the lack of concentration makes sense.”

I take my phone back and slide it back into my jeans, my eyes brightening at the fact I can talk about this to April. “I’m so excited, but I’m also very very nervous. Where is she going to take me? Is she going to go out of town because there isn’t a lot to do here? Gosh, what do I even wear…”

“Girls!” Our heads snap up to see Mr. Hudson glaring disapprovingly in our direction. “I know that neither of you have finished the equations on the board, so there’s no time for chat.”

“Sorry sir.” April says smoothly, tucking her hair behind her ear as she flashes her teachers pet smile. “Alex was struggling on the third equation and I offered to help.”

The lie rolls smoothly off her tongue but I know that our teacher doesn’t believe it for a second. I cringe slightly at the fact she tells the whole class I’m only on question three out of the total twelve questions, but I have been really out of it today. It’s common knowledge that chemistry is one of my strongest subjects, so I try and avoid some of the curious stares sent my way by my classmates, all of them wondering how I could possibly be stuck on question three.

“Must I remind you that anything you don’t finish today, you will be completing at home for next lesson.” He grumbles as he returns to the front of the classroom. I feel like just leaving it here and completing the remaining nine questions at home, because then I can help Mackenzie with the work she was complaining about to me yesterday.

I’m telling you, that girl is a nerd when it comes to social elective subjects liks psychology and sociology, but she somewhat struggles with maths based subjects like the sciences and maths itself. Those equation based subjects are my strong suit, so we both have somewhat come to an agreement to help each other out where we can. We haven’t really had any opportunity to use these study sessions with our conflicting schedules, but I know that we’re both free tonight after practice so I’ll ask her to help me when she comes over.

The bell rings to signal both the end of the lesson and the end of school, so I pack my things up and head to the locker room to get changed for practice. It isn’t a long practice today, coach mentioned a few fitness tests before she’ll let us go, seen as though we have a game tomorrow. I put my stuff down by my locker and quickly get changed, politely saying hello to everyone that enters after me whilst keeping a watchful eye out for a certain blonde.

I try and control my blush when I see her walk in, my eyes raking over her figure as discreetly as I can manage whilst pulling on my cleats. Her hair is down and falling in soft curls onto her shoulders, a pair of sunglasses pushed back into her hairline. A pair of ratty denim shorts make her tanned legs looks longer than usual, her curves revealed by the tight fitted cropped black vest she’s wearing, her grey eyes staring right at me, her eyebrow raised slightly.

“Afternoon.” She says as she takes a seat besides me and starts pulling off her converse, her gaze not yet leaving my face. “You never replied to my text.”

Oh shít. I immediately think as I realise I spent so much time daydreaming about the date she wanted to take me on, that I never actually agreed to go on it with her. God what an amateur move. I have the decency to blush as I see a smile tug at her lips, my mouth opening to apologise but being cut off by her speaking.

“April spoke to me and told me you were too busy daydreaming about it to actually reply so I somewhat forgive you.”

“Somewhat?” I grin, letting my hand brush over hers as I reach for my water bottle sitting beisde her. “Looks like I have some making up to do.”

I’m shocked at the obviously flirty undertone to my words, and I think Mackenzie is too going by the way her eyes widen slightly. I increase the distance between us slightly, allowing myself to breathe as I bend to tie the laces of my cleats. Despite enjoying the fact I felt comfortable with the boldness, the thought of getting caught still felt like ice spreading through my veins.

“Do you still want to hang out after school?” I ask her from the much safer distance of half a metre, or knees not even close enough to touch. “I think I’m gonna need your help with some homework.”

Mackenzie’s lips tug into a smirk as she sends me a sideways glance, her grey eyes full of humour and teasing. “Please, we both know you’re much smarter than me, what homework could you have that I could possible help you with?”

“I do actually have some psychology questions I need to finish, but I just need an excuse to spend time with you.” I send her an innocent expression, standing up from the bench as the rest of the team starts spilling in through the doors. Mackenzie’s eyes darken as they follow me across the room, an unreadable expression flickering across her features before she settles on a smile. “Think about it.”

~•~

I wait patiently in my car for Mackenzie whilst she finishes off in the shower. Training was as easy as I thought it would be, so we finished within the hour and Coach let us go. It was impressive looking at how our fitness levels just keep climbing, as did our confidence in our abilities. Mackenzie manages to complete an already well rounded team, and weirdly enough she has also been bringing out the best in Freya.

Speaking of that she devil, she hasn’t spoken to me since her plan to ruin Mackenzie and I failed. The glares I feel sent my way are just as strong as they used to be, and her face is always pulled into an expression of complete bitterness. But she hasn’t done anything else, which I don’t know if I should be relieved or nervous about.

I have stopped with the unnecessary, nasty comments I sometimes found myself saying to her during practice or under my breath. Treating her like that isn’t doing me any favours, so I no longer see the point in being mean, even if I do hate her.

I snapped from my daydream when I see a figure emerge from the changing rooms, her body hidden under a pair of baggy trackies and a large oversized hoodie. Her hair is piled on top of her head and her whole body screams tiredness.

The air is starting to chill as it gets later, the wind carrying a certain bite to it that you can only associate with the crossover between autumn and winter. Halloween is not far around the corner, which means that the weather that comes with thanksgiving and Christmas is not far away. I cannot wait for thick sweater and hot chocolate weather. The colder air means that I started up the car heaters. I have noticed that Mackenzie isn’t a fan of colder weather, her face always carrying a misery that comes with being cold.

She smiles slightly as she gets in the car, leaning across the centre console to give me a brief kiss on the lips before settling back into her chair and closing her eyes whilst mine remain wide and darting around.

There’s nobody here, calm down.

Sure enough my paranoia is ill placed, my eyes scanning my nearby surroundings to find that nobody is in sight, a realisation that has me releasing a slow breath.

I hate the fact I still feel like this. I look at the girl in my passenger seat and I want to be better for her, and I know I’m trying so that I can be good enough, so that I deserve her. But I still find myself swallowing harshly when I feel like eyes are on me, or I find myself looking around at everyone’s reactions when a gay scene comes on tv. I wish I didn’t care, and I hope one day soon I won’t.

Because I really couldn’t blame Mackenzie if she got tired of waiting, even though it would crush me. She deserves the best of the best, and a slow hateful feeling spreads in my chest when I think about how I know that’s not me.

How can the best a girl like her can find be a scared closeted girl who doesn’t know how to show her how much she cares?

“Are we planning on doing our homework in the car Alex? Or are we actually going back to yours?” I hear her tired voice mumble, my gaze catching sight of her soft smirk before it disappears.

I chuckle to push away the dark feelings and realise we’re still sat in the parking lot outside of school. I force myself not to look around as I cup her face in my hands and kiss her quickly, softly, briefly. The contact was so fleeting she didn’t get chance to respond before I pull away, her thick eyelashes fluttering as she opens her eyes to look at me with a smile. “What was that for?”

I shrug and smile shyly, turning to face out of the back of my car so I can reverse out of my parking space. “Do I need a reason?”

“No.” Mackenzie smiles, grabbing my free hand and pulling it into her lap. “I suppose you don’t.”

I try and concentrate on driving, Mackenzie’s thumb stroking patterns over my knuckles as she laces our fingers together. My chest could burst with how I’m feeling, but I keep a straight face, occasionally squeezing my hand so that she knows I enjoy what she’s doing.

The drive is brief, and soon enough we’re breaking the physical contact so we can get out of the car and walk up the steps to my house, once again neither of my parents are home.

I kick my shoes off at the door and head towards my kitchen, my stomach grumbling at the realisation it’s nearly six pm and I’ve not eaten since lunch. I know I have some leftover pizza from the night before, easily enough for us to share if Mackenzie is hungry. I take it out of the fridge and put it in the microwave whilst I watch her trail behind me and take a seat at the island counter, her gaze glued to me as I lean against the counter by the sink.

“What are you looking at?” I say softly, watching as her lips tug upwards into a smile, her head leaning against her palm as she drums her fingers against her cheek.

“I’m just looking at you.” She shrugs, her smile widening when I roll my eyes, her words forcing a blush to rise on my skin.

“There’s not much to look at.” I tease, watching as she rolls her eyes and lets out an incredulous snort from her nose.

“Please.” She states, pushing herself from her seated position and walking over to me. Her arms trap me against the counter as she leans on it, her nose barely a whisper away from my own. “You know I think you’re beautiful.”

I can feel myself blush heavier, my fingers reaching up to wrap themselves around a stray curl falling by her ear. The close proximity lets me breathe in the scent of her body wash and shampoo, a combination of what I think is tea tree and vanilla, something I instantly decide I like. “Aren’t you a charmer?”

“I try.” She grins, her gaze settling on my lips as her arm winds its way around my waist. “But I’m not lying.”

I believe her, simply because she says everything with such an intensity it has me hanging onto every word. I smile softly and let my hand fall to the back of her neck, my fingers gripping her skin as I pull her head down so I can kiss her.

I sigh as she kisses me back, melting into her touch as she tightens her hold on my waist. Kissing her is something that feels so natural, so normal, and I wish I could do it more.

“How does Saturday sound for our date then?” Mackenzie asks me once she separates her lips from mine. I smile as her lips skim against my neck, her eyes making contact with mine whilst she awaits an answer.

“Sounds very good to me.” I reply, seeing her grin before she kisses me again, her mouth dominant over mine.

She moves her lips expertly, her teeth biting on my lip and then soothing it with her tongue, the simple action causing an unnaturally deep sound to emerge from the back of my throat. My legs are feeling weak, my body propped up by her tall frame pressing me into the counter behind me, her knee wedging itself between my legs. My mind is feeling dizzy, unable to focus on anything she’s doing as there is so much happening at once.

Her hands are sneaking up the inside of my shirt, her lips now latched onto the skin above my collarbone. The combination of that and the scent of vanilla from her hair and skin is just too much, my body working completely on overdrive and following natural instinct.

“I think the pizza is done.” She mutters against my skin, making no effort to stop the barrage of kisses she’s placing there.

“It’ll be fine.” I reply breathlessly, cupping her face in my hands and guiding her lips back up to mine.

Fire starts to burn in my chest as I feel her rake her fingers down my sides, my arms slipping around the back of her neck to pull her closer. Mackenzie makes my body feel like it’s on fire, heat licking at every available section of skin. She makes my heart feel like it’s going to burst from my chest, my body addicted to every little thing about her.

From the way her skin feels under my fingertips, to the way her lips feel against my own, I’m hooked on her like a drug, and kissing is the only release I’ve found so far. But I’m starting to feel like it isn’t quite enough.

“Pizza. Going cold.” Mackenzie breathes as she pulls away, her darkened eyes looking at me with an expression I haven’t seen before. “And we have work to do.”

I pout automatically, watching as Mackenzie’s swollen lips pull into a smile before pressing against mine once again briefly, her hand slapping my ass affectionately. “Don’t pout babe, we can carry this on after you’ve helped me with chemistry.”

I groan but let her pull away nonetheless, grabbing the pizza from the microwave. I know that I need to do at least some work, but I’m sure if I try my hardest to distract her I’ll probably succeed and get what I want anyway.

I always do.

~•~

Hey guys! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!

I saw a comment saying that someone wanted to see how I picture Kiera so I figured I’d make a little aesthetic for her too!

I have a feeling she isn’t quite what people expected but you guys wanted to know how I picture her and this is it!

Also I’m very sorry this chapter is so late! Work has been drowning me and I’ve been busy with my girlfriend so I’ve struggled to find time to write for you guys, but I found a lot of motivation to read after I was offered the chance to join the wattpad stars programme!

I posted on my wall about how happy I am but honestly words can’t describe how grateful I am for every single one you that reads, votes and comments on this story. I love each and every one of you that made this possible for me!

Anyways,

I hope you guys enjoyed and I hope you keep reading!

Lots of love,
Lauryn xoxo