Chapter 27

yns pov:

I’m running on pure adrenaline. I can’t even feel my fingers, just the unadulterated heat that tangles around them. It feels like I’m burning from the inside out with no outlet for my powers. I can’t even direct this energy towards her because with how much anger is surging through my veins, it might genuinely kill her. My pulse feels like a million bees stinging my chest and I can hear the blood rushing in my ears. I can’t breathe, this is wrong. This is so wrong, I can’t hurt her. I need to leave. “Yn? You’re eyes are blue. Like electric blue. You need to take some deep breaths, copy me.” She takes multiple exaggerated breaths but I can’t focus, the energy is too much. My vision swims and red magic bands hold me up. “Yn, if you don’t let out the power, you are going to black out, it needs to go somewhere, if you internalise it, you’ll just hurt yourself.” Better me than anyone else, even her.

My vision starts to dim at the edges as I feel myself spiralling, I speak for the first time since my powers got out of control. “Go.” My voice is strained from the strength of holding in my power. She doesn’t move, but walls of red surround me. This is cool, like a portable prison cell. I should be locked up, I’m too unstable, too unnatural.

“Jarvis, call Tony and Natasha down here.” I can’t hold it anymore, my whole body is shaking. i slowly fall to my knees, wrapping my hands over the back of my neck. I see both of them run in in my peripheral vision, but I can’t hear them. My lungs are burning and blue strands of electricity bounces up and down my arms. Its happening, I’m losing it. Blue enshrouds me, blocking me from view of the others as energy spews out of me. It feels like I’m drowning all over again. It just keeps going, it feels like my soul is being sucked out of my body.

The red mist can finally be seen as the blue starts to dissipate. I glance at the blurry figures who stare at me incredulously. “Help…” My words come out as a broken whisper as my vision fades and my body crashes to the floor.

==================================
Natasha’s Pov:

I rush to her side, my hands frantically searching for a pulse. She’s still breathing and there’s no burns or any signs of physical injury. “I think she’s okay.” I blow out a long, relieved breath. That looked like hell, I have no idea how she survived that, but I’m glad she’s on our team. “What the hell were you thinking?!”

“I had it under control! Everyone was completely safe.” I scoff, not even attempting to hold in my feelings. Is she stupid? She didn’t know what yns powers were like or how they would affect her and yet she drives her to this point?

“Clearly it wasn’t under control or she never would’ve gotten to this point! What were you two even talking about?” I’ve never heard Tony shout before, he usually just pouts like a toddler, but this is fear. He was worried about her getting hurt. Its rare to see Tony care for anyone openly. We all know he does care, but to see it in person shows just how much yn has wormed her way into our messed up family.

Her eyes drift to the ground, her shame loud enough to distract from the look on her face like she has been personally slapped by yn. “She isn’t a fan of people who cheat. Apparently its one of the only things she cannot forgive, especially when its done to one of her friends. Her anger got the better of her and she started spiralling.” There’s an awkward silence as tonys gaze flickers between us, finally realising what happened.

Even he looks at her with disdain, he tuts and moves to yns side. “I may have been a playboy, but even I have never cheated. I hate to say it, but that’s messed up. Its even worse that you’re so open about it.” He scoops yn up in his arms before carrying her out of the gym.

The air feels dead and stale, like the barren weight of our relationship is sinking us further in the bottomless ocean. “I don’t understand why you did it, and I never will. But…I’m done holding your mistakes against you. I’m forgiving and forgetting. Besides, now that Tony knows, you’ll be getting lots of punishment for your actions from the rest of the team.” Its exhausting being mad and she doesnt deserve my energy. I don’t give her the chance to react, I just walk away, heading to Tony’s lab to check on yn. I don’t know what was happening with her in that room, but it probably scared the hell out of her, I know it would scare me.

==================================
Yns pov:
I gasp as i startle awake, sitting up bolt right. My vision blurs as i look around at the familiar figures surrounding the medical bed im on. “You scared the hell out of me. Dont do that!” Yelenas words come out as a broken plea. Theres no jokes this time. In her mind shes nearly lost me twice in a week. I rub my temples trying to soothe the ache in my head as i swing my legs over the side of the bed.

Tonys hands grab onto my arms, firmly holding me in place. “Woah kid, not so fast. We dont know how…that affected you.” That. No one even know what to call it. I would say it was a natural disaster. Thats what i am now. Unstable. Explosive.

“I didnt mean to. I just got so angry.” Tears prick my eyes and i feel the bed dip next to me as yelenas arms wrap around me, pulling my head against her chest. I listen to the sound of her heartbeat in her chest, using it to ground me.

“Yn, if this is going to work, youre going to have to figure out a way to control your emotions. I know its not as easy as it sounds, but bruce has offered to help.” Nats words linger in the air, the implication cutting deep withing my chest. They have to send a monster to help a monster.

“Maybe we should just find a way to cut off my power.” Everyone turns to look at me, cornern etched on their faces. “Its the only logical thing. It will help to protect people from me.” Yelenas hand trails up and down my back, soothing me.

“People dont need protecting from you. You arent out there trying to hurt people. And we can help control it like we did today if you cant hold it in.” I dont know. I dont like the idea that im walking around so freely when i can hurt people any second without any control over it.

“Its not just about protecting others.” Tony starts as he turns the screen to face me. “Yn what happened right as the building collapsed on you? What do you remember?” Whats he getting at?

“I dont know. I remember sitting in that chair, waiting for death and the next minute everything explodes in a flash of blue-”

“Blue?” Nats eyebrows pinch together as she looks at the screen. “Yn did it not occur to you that no explosion emits a blue colour?”

“When you find out that electricity can literally shoot from your body, not much tends to surprise you.” Im done with this, i just want everything to go back to how it was this morning. With me and yelena being us and no powers to worry about.

“Yn, your powers can act as a sort of protective barrier. Thats why you made it out of that explosion. We cant block your powers if it means keeping you alive.” Tonys words leave a ringing in my ear as everything else fades away. Of course the thing im scared of is what will save me. Why would it be any other way?

I push myself up off of the bed as the others hands hover around me. “I swear if one of you pulls me back down on this bed, i am not responsible for any minor shocks you may get.” They step out of my way as i stalk out of medbay. Im not going to sit around and feel sorry for myself anymore. I finally have the power to help people and im not going to waste that because im scared. Its not fair to the rest of new york. I feel adrenaline running through my veins and the electric buzz that overwhelmed me before. I walk into the gym, spotting wanda training with her powers. Shes focused as a red storm swirls around her. “Wanda.” My voice is quiet but its startles her anyway.

She turns and the red mist directs towards me with deadly accuracy. My hands fly up to cover my face instinctually and just as its inches away from my face a surge of blue meets it, pushing it back. The blue starts to consume the red, changing the power dynamic. Her powers are strong but precise, focused on not hurting me. Mine are irratic and uncontrollable, moving without any restraint. Its a dangerous mix and my heart is crashing against my rib cage, trying to get it to stop. Im gonna have to take the fall. I pry my hand down from her direction, energy draining quickly as the blue finally dies out. Thats when the red picks back up in an unstoppable motion as it knocks into me, forcing me back into the wall. I peel away from the wall, falling to my knees, my hands clutching my chest where the magic hit. Wanda dives across the room to get to me, falling to her knees beside me. “Yn?! Im so sorry!”

“Im fine. It was my fault, i didnt mean to scare you. I just wanted to see if we could get back to training.” Well thats as good a start as any. I not only used my power but i also directed it. Its progress. “Im sorry about biting your head off before. For the sake of training, lets just not talk about it. Truce?”

“Truce.” She extends her hand as a peace offering. I take it, my ribs flaring with pain as i stagger to my feet. “That was impressive. How did you do that?”

“Oh that? That was nothing, i decided to ace using my power in the 30 minutes i was unconscious in medbay.” Its not very funny sarcasm, but ive just been thrown into a wall so i think ill get a pass this time.

She folds her arms giving me a stern look. “You could have just said it was a fluke.”

“Yeah but wheres the fun in that?” I give her a cocky grin before i continue. “It was defensive, instinctual. And then i couldnt stop.” At least i know another, less destructive trigger of my powers.

“Thats good, now we know some of the triggers, we can use that to help you to get used to using your powers. After so long, it will be automatic like blinking.” I hope thats true, i hate the idea of being so unstable, like someone that has to be managed, a burden. Yelena would never make me feel like that though. When she pulled me into her chest, that wasnt a final hug before i become too far gone, too explosive. It was her showing me that im still who i was. That in her eyes, im still human.

40 minutes later, wanda keeps throwing energy balls at me in an attempt to get my powers to work. At first it was just a scare tactic and if my powers didnt kick in, it would hit close by. Thats starting to wear off now though. She throws another ball of red towards me and i raise my hands steady and focused. Blue sputters around them uncertainly before fizzling out completely. Thats when it crashes harshly against my still broken ribs. I double over, breathing heavy as my hands clutch my distorted abdomen. I slowly crouch down, leaning on my knees as i try to get my breath back. “What the hell was that?!”

“Training tactic.” She says it simply like that explains everything. Another ball of red collides with me, knocking me back, my shoulder giving out when i try to stop myself from falling. A whimper of pain echoes through the room, but she doesnt give me any sympathy. She just keeps throwing them.

One after the other, relentless against my aching body. Im backed against the wall but they just come more fiercely. “STOP!” I hear the familiar voice cut through all the pain and something snaps in me. I raise my hands defensively and shoot an electric blue energy across the room, hitting wandas red shield square in the middle. I chance a glimpse at her, praying that wanda listened to her cry. Her emerald eyes are wide with fear as she moves next to me, her hands instinctively reaching to cup my face. “Are you okay detka?” I lean into her warmth slightly before pulling away.

“Never better.” My shoulder is screaming at me in protest of my lie.

Yelena raises an eyebrow and narrows her eyes slightly. “I dont like when you lie to me. Especially about your health.” Her hand slides down my neck weighing heavy on my shoulder as i wince ever so slightly in pain. Its not noticeable if you havent been trained how to spot weakness. Unfortunately, yelena is not one of those people. “Is it just your shoulder?” Her eyes drag back up to mine and an intense heat spreads through my stomach. “The truth this time.”

“She hit my ribs, but they dont hurt too much. Its fine lena, really. I just need a minute.”

“You can take lots of minutes. Youre done for the day.” I open my mouth to protest but she turns around, ending the discussion definitively. “You should know better than to hurt someone whos already injured. Or did that knowledge leave with your ability to be loyal?” Maybe its best if i dont get involved. We’ve all cut into wanda for what she did, but yelena hasnt had her turn.

“I know what im doing. She needed the push. They wont go light on her out there just because shes injured. She made good progress today because of my training.” Yelena shoots her a look that would make nat shrivel in on herself. She lightly wraps her fingers around mine as she pulls me in the direction of the door.

“Lena, take a breath, wanda was right to train me the way she did. Its working. I can use my power on command now.”

She stops suddenly, making me nearly walk into her. Her eyes are heavy with fear. Shes not attempting to hide from me anymore – not like she ever really did – but this is the most vulnerable ive ever seen her. “So im supposed to just let her hurt you?”

I squeeze her hand reassuringly before planting a soft kiss on her lips. Her shoulders drop and she leans into the kiss. I sliwly pull away, resting my heady gently against hers. “Its just a few bruises lena. Dont confuse your anger towards wanda with your fear for me. I can hold my own, you know i can.” I pull away completely and walk away, giving her time to calm down.

I head into the kitchen to see pete and tony chatting over some blueprints and papers at the counter as i grab a bottle of water from the fridge. “You know, you have a lab to do this in.”

“Well you wouldnt understand what a change of scenery can do for the scientific mind.” Tony gives you a snide half smile that attempts to distract you grom his tired eyes.

“I think sleep would be more effective.” He grunts in disagreement, clearly under the impression that any time spent away from his work is wasted time. “Youre forgetting that i built your aiming system.”

He places down the papers, giving you his full attention as he sips his coffee. “Well if youre such a genius, why have i never heard of anything that youve created?”

“I got kicked out before i could complete my first project and then things got too expensive.”

Peters eyes havent left the blueprints that stark dropped infront of him, they just scan and rescan in deep thought. “Mr stark, i think my webshooters would-” Stark holds up his finger dismissively as he cuts him off.

“You have all the money in the world now. And a great lab.” Wow way to toot his own horn. Ive seen better labs personally. The others in the programme had incredible workspaces, littered with incomplete projects.

I let out a nervous chuckle and shake my head. “I wouldnt even know what to make.” Even before i got kicked out, i struggled to brainstorm ideas for weapons. My first project was an aiming system that never misses, but that was small. It was just a start, i nearly got kicked out because i couldnt come up with inventions. I was smarter than any one of them, but i lacked creativity.

“Whats something you’ve always wanted to make?” I scoff but he just looks at me expectantly, his arms folded like a disapproving father – and i know a lot about those.

“A hoverboard.” I feel heat flush my cheeks at the silly suggestion. Its not enough that i embarassed myself in school, i now have to embarass myself infront of the greatest inventor the world has ever known. “You know, like with the flying cars that howard stark created.” Stop talking. Stop making this worse.

“So then make it. You’re smart enough.” What? No thats a waste of resources, what would be the point? Just for fun?

“Its a waste of money and time, it doesnt help people.”

“Who says it has to?” Is this why ive always struggled? Maybe if i start creating things i enjoy, the block thats been held firmly in place for so many years will finally be gone.

“Come with me.” I leave, forgetting entirely about the events of the day as my vision tunnels, allowing me only to see what i want to make. I jump in his seat like its my own, taking to the lab like i personally built it. My hands fly over keys as i bring up past projects and other scienctific queeries around the arc reactor and how it can be used.

“Oh we-we’re doing this now. In my lab. Okay.” I dont respond i just bring up howard starks blue prints for the flying cars and the little device in the wheel that makes it possible.

“If we take the technology used in howards cars and compare it to that in your suit, produced by the arc reactor, we can minimise the technology and alter it to make it more suitable for this type of use.” He puts a hand on my non injured shoulder, a proud smile beaming on his face as his eyes light up with ideas.

“We could keep improving it too when we get new ideas.”

I furrow my eyebrows and look back at the messy, abandoned science projects that enshroud the screen. “Like what?”

“Like something to help make it battle ready.” To help people. So this is how he works? He creates whatever he wants and then alters that to fit a certain purpose.

“Bombs?” I ask hesitantly thinking of the possibilities.

“Knives.” He continues, a small smile on his face as he practically buzzes with excitement.

“Forcefield!” Hundreds of possibilities fill my head at one time. The block has gone and now ideas are flooding my mind, drowning out everything that has happened over the last few months.