Chapter 21

Yelenas pov:
I feel it in my soul. Its late at night and i just know. Somethings happened to her. I cant explain it. I dont even know if its real. But any hope that may have remained is now gone, along with her. I feel the emptiness after the initial feeling of impending doom. Tears drip down my face like rain. I dont move, dont wipe away the tears, just sit in the hollowness. “Yelena?” Nat appears in the doorway. She does random checks to make sure i dont do anything stupid in my loneliness.

I choke out the words, the lump in my throat evergrowing. “Shes dead.”

She kneels in front of me, her hands on my knees. “Yel, i promise, we’ll find her-“

“No. We wont. I cant explain it, but somethings happened, i can feel it.” She shakes her head and holds my hands.

“Yel, shes alive. Even if something has happened, it doesnt mean shes dead.” I dont know. I think shes dead. She wraps her arms around me and just holds me as the song ends. Shes not alive.

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Yns pov:
Every inch of my body hurts. I cant move. I feel paralysed under the crushing weight on top of me. Layers upon layers of concrete. My eyes are heavy, barely open. The chain are broken along with the dessimated chair. Images of yelena smiling and peter hugging me flash through my head. Not their voices or any sound, just images of them happy. That same electric buzz floods through my body. Yelena and peter mustve been enough motivation to bust down the flood gates for my newfound power. It would be pretty lame if i die having only used my power once. Energy buzzes through my nerves and i muster the last of my strength and place my hands on the ground. I start to push, raising my body maybe an inch before it drops back down harshly. I cry out in pain and a sob catches in my throat. I lightly tap my head on the ground, frustrated. Rubble completely encases me. Yelena flashes through my head one more time. The last time i saw her. Her hand on my cheek, stroking the scar on my collarbone. I cant let my rejection be the last thing she hears from me.

I put my hands back on the ground and scream the whole time as i push. Adrenaline surges through me and i start to rise. My back screams in pain but i get my knee beneath me, holding me in a sitting position. I cant breathe. Ragged breaths fill the eery quiet. My chest rises and falls quicker than ever. I suck in a deep breath before grunting and screaming through gritted teeth as my arms and legs shake. My legs start to straighten before they slowly start to drop again. A scream tears through me and i keep going, forcing the rubble off the top of me, landing in a loud crash beside me. My spine is releived, the pressure lightening from no longer being crushed. I hunch over and empty the contents on my stomach onto what remains of the building. Ill leave that part of the story out if i ever make it back alive.

I stumble over the jagged rubble and walk for miles and miles before i see anywhere i recognise. My body is tired and my vision blurs. My head is pounding and i cant concentrate. I struggle to see where im going (the dark streets not helping) and i eventually just walk in random directions. Im so close, yet so far. I limp the whole time from the physical toll on my body.

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Tonys pov:
Im waiting for friday to search for certain words in the files when the alert echoes through the room. The day we’ve been waiting for finally here. “Sir, there is a presence at the gates. I believe it to be yn.” My blood runs cold.

“Pull it up on the screen friday.” The video feed fills the screen and i cant believe what im seeing. I rub my eyes but shes still there. This is real. Im out of my lab before by coffee mug shatters on the ground. I race through the hallways – and i dont run. I pound two doors, which are fortubately close to each other. Nat comes out fully dressed, quietly closing the door behind her. Wandas in there but nats not been sleeping, shes been waiting for this news. Peter comes out in hello kitty pjs and an i survived my trip to nyc t-shirt. He clearly was not expecting to be getting this. “Shes here. Yns here. Shes outside, we need to go. We need to get yelena.”

“Stark slow down. Dont get yelena, not until we know yn is okay, theres no need to scare her or to make her see yn in that state. Now lets go.” Natasha strides down the corridor, the perfect image of cool under pressure. Im practically bouncing with adrenaline. All excitement fades when i see her. She looks half dead.

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Yns pov:
I reach the gates but my legs wobble. Lights come to life throughout the compound. I take a few more wary steps before my legs give out and i crash to my knees. I can see the door, but i cant move anymore. Im so close, yet so far. My heart screams for my body to move, but it refuses to listen. Yelena. I feel raw energy burn through my body as i ready myself to carry on when the door swings open. Relief floods my system. Nat, tony and peter. But no yelena. They run  towards me, peter drops one side of me, his hands hovering, unsure where to place them to avoid hurting me. Nat drops the other side and places a supportive hand on my shoulder. Im glad she does. It helps me understand that this is real and not some delusion. “Im sorry, i didnt mean to be gone so long, i just. I just wanted to go…to go…”

The word escapes me. Pete finishes my sentence, i dont know why the word wont come to my mind. “Home? We know, dont worry. What happened?”

My breathing is still heavy and my words are rushed. “Moms alive. She found me.” Petes face turns morbid. But the others nod along. They knew. Ofcourse, the….recording thingy.

My breath hitches when i see her. Its the first full breath ive taken since before the explosion. Her soft blonde hair is tied up into a cute messy bun. Her emerald eyes dart over me multiple times. She runs faster than i thought possible. “Get away from her!” She screams at them, not a care in the world for the consequences. She drops to the ground and hugs me, holding on tight. I wince in pain and groan slightly but she doesnt let go. She pulls away and holds one hand on my shoulder whilst the other tucks hair behind my ear. Her hand moves down my face before cupping my cheek and stroking her thumb over the small scar on my cheekbone. I tilt my head, melting into her embrace.

Her touch helps to ground me. It distracts me from the pain, from everything thats happened. I give her a weak smile as tears gloss over my eyes. “We need to stop meeting like this.”

She chuckles and tears fill her eyes. “You spent all those weeks alone, thinking about a reunion and you couldnt think of a better line?”

My voices wobbles as i speak. “I thought it was perfect.” I break eye contact for the first time. “Im sorry i didnt-“

“Hey, no, its okay. Its okay. Its not your fault.” I trail my hand up her arm to her face, but i can feel my vision darkening at the edges.

My words are slurred, barely legible. “Yelena i-”

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Yelenas pov:
She slumps forwards into my arms and tears slip down my face, warm against my skin. I slip my arms beneath her back and her knees as i lift her. Shes so thin. I dont think they’ve fed her once. I choke down a sob, not letting them see me break. Shes not dead. I carry her inside to med bay. I lay her down gently on a bed and tony practically pushes us out. I slam my hand against the wall and nat gaze turns to mine. My face is twisted with anger. “You should’ve told me she was here!”

“I didnt know what state she was in, i didnt want you to see her die, or see her really hurt.”

I can feel myself losing any composure i had left. “Did you see her?! Her face is covered in bruises and blood! AND THATS AFTER WEEKS THERE! SHE PROBABLY HEALED SOME!”

“Pete, leave us please.” He glances between us before tiptoeing out of the room. Nat just stands there quiet for a minute. “You are struggling, you have been since she was taken. I get that. But you cant use it as an excuse to be mad at everyone else. Take a breath and think about her. She wouldnt want you to be acting like this. Its not you.” Shes right and i hate it. I just dont know what to do without yn.

I suck in a deep breath and shake my head before heading towards the door. I cant stay here and wait. I need to do something. “Im going to the gym.” Its better than sitting and sulking, tasha knows that, its why she doesnt follow, its been weeks since ive exercised and i desperately need to.

I warm up before putting on the gloves. I throw a quick combo and fix my stance. I do it again and again until its perfect. This has to be perfect. I thought she was dead. How stupid am i? She survives everything. I shouldve looked harder.

“Maybe you should do more missions.” The voice rings out in the quiet buzz of the compound. Its a soft voice just trying to reach out as a friend. Wanda is stood at the door, sympathy enshrouding her face.

“Is yn okay?” I pull the gloves off and throw them down. I dont know how long i was going for, but sweat trickles down my face and im struggling to breathe and it takes a lot to get me in that state.

“Shes fine, tony come out a little while ago to say we can sit with her. You would know that if you were there. Why are you hiding out here?”

I swipe my arm across my forehead. “Im not hiding out, i didnt know we could sit with her.”

“I dont believe you. You know that if you sit there and wait, then its real. But you just think about the fact shes hurt. You havent thought about the fact that shes alive and when she wakes up, you’re the person she’ll want to see.”

I scoff and rub my eyes, trying to relieve the stress. “Im the last person she’ll want to see. I blurted out something like an idiot.” Wandas hand finds my forearm and i look up to see the worry in her eyes.

“Her dad had basically just died in her head. She needed time, that doesnt mean she doesnt want to be your girlfriend.” How did she know? Wanda has this magic way of knowing exactly what to say, even when you dont know what you want to hear.

“How did you know thats-“

“Because its the only thing that would scare you off – the thought of losing her as a friend.” Jesus. Wanda read an assasin like a book, now thats a talent. I stand up and my limbs feel like jelly. I start to move towards the door, my joints feeling stiff. “Where you going?”

“Where do you think?” She smirks at me and i feel blush creep up my neck. I quickly walk towards her room, not even acknowledging the people who speak to me on my way. I basically run to her room and push through the doors violently, earning an alarmed look from everyone inside. Shes still asleep. She looks peaceful. Its weird, shes never looked peaceful in her life. The harsh cuts, now clean, look wrong on her face, it sends a rage through my stomach and makes my jae tighten. How could they do that to her? Her arm is in a sling and god knows what else is wrong. Peter is at her side and nat moves so i can sit next to her. I reach for her hand, it feels like ice. This is all wrong. I feel peters eyes watching me but i dont care. He can judge all he wants but he was the one who didnt care she was gone. Honestly, some brother he is.

“S-so are uh you two together?” Peters hesitant voice rings out in the silence. He has the audacity to take an interest now? “When did that start?”

“Never. We’re just friends.”

He scoffs and looks back at yn. “Yeah right.” Its a judgemental, harsh tone.

“If you have a problem, just say so.” My words are clipped and i feel myself losing my patience as my leg starts to bounce.

“Im just saying, everything was just fine before you got involved.” My fists clench and i start hitting it off the wood of the armrest.

Natasha stands up and places a hand on peters shoulder. “Hey can you give us a minute?”

His face contorts into anger and he shrugs her hand away. “This is my sister, if you want to talk, you guys leave.” Oh i swear im gonna punch the little fucker.

“I wasnt asking. Leave. Before i remove you.” He should not have challenged nat. It makes me smile on the inside when he begrudgingly stomps out.

She sits down but doesnt so much as look at me. “Well?”

Her gaze drifts to me, confused. “Well what?”

“What did you want to talk about?”

“Oh i didnt, that kid was just way out of line and pissing me off.” I laugh, its not a strong laugh like with yn, but its something. “Wow shes not even back a day and you’re smiling.”

I dont reply, but my face aches from repressing a smile. “When is she meant to wake up?”

“We dont know, she took a hell of a beating. She has a dislocated shoulder, broken ribs, bruce said he wouldnt be surprised if she had a concussion and she has bruises and cuts everywhere. Not to mention the cautorised slice marks.” Fucking monsters. Im gonna tears their limbs from their bodies and ram it straight up their- “Im worried about her.” Shit thats not good. Nat never worries about anyone. “They did a good deal to her. She’ll need you if she wakes up.”

“If?” My heart seizes in my chest, I could cry. Its pathetic.

“I meant when. Ignore it.” She doesnt think shes gonna come back from this. She has to, i need to fix things, i have to do what i didnt have the courage to do before. Its been 2 hours since she wandered in. “How have you been?”

“Im not the one lying in that bed.” Im not important right now.

“No but the missing alcohol tells me youve been going through some stuff.” That stuff doesnt matter. Shes back now.

“Ignore it.” My words are clipped and bitter. I cant help it. Seeing her like this makes me want to tear everyone and everything apart.

“Anger. Its better than wallowing in self pity.” Did she really just fucking say that?

“Its called grief. I know you’re too much of a petty self involved robot to know what that is but its real.” She chuckles and my nails dig into the armrest of the chair. “What did you send the kid away so you can piss me off all by yourself?”

“You’re starting to act more like yourself. Not you when yns here, but still.” How would she know? She ditched me in the red room for- take a deep breath. I take a few deep breaths and see nat smirk from the corner of my eye. She has helped me alot. I would probably have killed myself by now if she hadnt reached out and offered me a place to live and even a job.

“Do we know when she’s gonna wake up?” My eyes follow the trail of cuts and bruises that litter her face. It feels like every part of me is screaming to do something.

“Bruce says it could be a while. He thinks we should worry at about the 15 hour mark because of the possibility that there was a head injury.” 15 hours?! God even i havent slept that long before. She’ll be fine. She’ll wake up any minute. She has to.

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Nats pov:
Its been 5 hours already. 1/3 of the time before we worry. Shes not exactly looking any better. “Im getting coffee, you want some?”

“We should wait a little, incase yn wakes up.” My heart breaks for her. Yns not going to wake up any time soon. Yelenas been saying things like that since she got in here. Peter is just sat next to yn, his eyes unmoving and unfocused. He doesnt reply to my question. They’ll both dehydrate if they keep this up. I quietly slip out of the room. Immediately the air feels lighter and its easier to breathe. Its like escaping death one painful second at a time. The hallways are empty and the usual buzz of the compound is dead. It feels abandoned. Yn has really affected this place, more than anyone had realised. I tiptoe down the corridor, feeling the need to hide and conform to the quiet.

Theres only wanda in the kitchen, taking her usual place. “I know you like cooking, but it feels like you’re always here lately.” She gives me a sad smile that doesnt quite reach her eyes.

“Im useful here. I dont know how to help, so im here to cook.” I didnt know they were friends.

“Do you guys get along?” I snake my arms aroubd her waist and pull her into a hug.

“We’re friends, believe it or not.” I didnt exactly picture yn as spending time with anyone other than yel. Her warm breath tickles my neck and i move to plant a kiss on her lips. Its small but meaningful. Since we’ve been searching for yn, there hasnt been time for much else with everyone trying to stay busy, it feels like its been months since i really looked at wanda. Shes tired and worn down, trying to help everyone else hoping someone will realise she needs someone to help her. This is what she does, i shouldve noticed sooner.

“Take a break wands, the others can look after themselves.” I feel her relax and see the relief in her eyes. “You need to be looked after too. Im banning you from the kitchen until you speak to yn.”

“Well i know shes not awake yet because you would be happier, so why arent you with them?” Her fingers run through the baby hairs at the base of my skull. Ive missed her.

“Just getting some coffee and water. Peter wont acknowledge anyone and yelenas convinced yn will wake up soon so she wont leave, eat or drink.” She pulls away from me, but her fingers interlick with mine as she moves towards the kettle. She puts everything in the cups and boils the kettle.

“Is there room for one more?” Shes hesitant, doesnt want to be in the way, she was taught that she doesnt matter and she should act as though. The feeling has faded but you can tell in her hesitation that its still there whispering in her ear. It made me really happy to take down hydra.